Divine

Chapter 8- Numb

Mateo's POV

There is something going on with Adriana. She is acting very weird and she is skipping meals.

Flashback to this morning

It is 11am, Adriana has not come down for breakfast yet. She is usually done with breakfast by now and would be on her way to work.

I walk up the stairs and towards her bedroom to check on her. I knock on the door but I receive no answer. I knock again, louder this time and the door swings open revealing a sunken looking Adriana. She has dark circles and heavy bags under her eyes, her face just looked so tired like she was so done everything.

"Addy? Princesa? Its 11. Come eat breakfast."

"Fuck," she said running her hands through her unruly hair. "I need to rush to the office. I promise I'll have have something on the way."

"You better. Rush now."

"Yeah ok"

A while later she came more covered up than usual but I don't remark on it. I just hand her a sandwich so she can eat it on the way. She takes it more for my sake than hers.

Flashback over

I knock on papa's office door.

"Come in," he yells.

I enter the room and shut the door behind. I look around, fortunately he doesn't have anything going on and no one else is in the room. Just papa.
He looks up at me from his seat with a glass of whiskey in his hand.

"What happened?"

I sigh, knowing she will hate me for saying anything about this to papa.

"It's Adriana."

I know I have captured his attention now. He looks at me with furrowed eyebrows and worry etched on his face.

"What about her?"

"She has not been eating at all for the past days and when I called her down this morning she didnt eat anything and just left for work. God you should have seen her face when I went up. She looked like she had been crying and not sleeping at all for days. I think we should talk to her about it. I am sure something is bothering her."

He nods and says, "Ok, I'll bring it up during dinner."

He then gets up and goes in front of huge window overlooking the garden, clearly dismissing me and ending the conversation. I sigh and exit the office, going back to the kitchen to make lunch.

****

Adriana's POV

"Adriana," papa calls me as soon as I enter the house. "Please come here."

I sigh and enter the living room, plastering a smile on my face seeing my brothers sitting there as well. "What is it?"

"Come, sit here," he says patting the seat next to him. 

"What happened princesa? You have not been eating."

"Uhm- What no? I'm perfectly fine," I say, guilt chewing my insides a bit.

"Don't lie bebe. Please tell me. Maybe I can help you."

I gulp, tears already threatening my eyes. "Fine. If you want to know so bad."

I sit on the soft, grey loveseat and begin. 

"You guys were like a picture in my mind and heart. I even had dreams of a younger version of myself with all of you, having fun. What I refused was believing that this ever existed and that my dreams were not reality and the pictures were just illusions. My heart could not bear the pain. It's always easier to be numb and not believe the truth right in front of your eyes."

Especially when you have been abused and what not by your own mother. When the person who is supposed to be kind, loving, caring and gentle did this along with her boyfriend who raped you every other day, who had men to rape you and do whatever they wanted to you, only to gain money to buy drugs and alcohol. Being numb was the only option I ever had.

Finally lifting my head, I see tears filled in everyone's eyes and papa hugs me softly like I am too fragile. "I do not know what happened to you but I know you are my bravest child," he whispers and kisses my forehead.

Next, each of my brothers hug me and kiss my forehead or cheek while whispering simple words that make me feel stronger. In the end, I am left alone with Xander who clings to me like a koala. I silently wince since he is pressing on the wound on my ribs that is still sore but I let him. I let out a relieved sigh as he let goes of me.

"What happened to you?" He asks with concern, lacing his voice.

I can't look at him. I know exactly what he is talking about but I can't talk about it yet. It took an entire year to just tell it to my best friend.

"Not yet hermano."

He nods but I know he is hurt, I can clearly see it in his eyes.

"Can, this is not about you but you need to understand that I don't trust easily and nobody knows about this shit that has been happening for 12 years. Please trust me, I will tell all of you eventually just not yet."

"So you don't trust us." He says it in a flat tone and as if it's a fact.

"I trust you all but not enough to tell you about my life that you, none of you, were a part of."

"How bad could it even be? A few slaps, right?"

"Don't you dare go there!" I say in a warning tone. "You have no idea what I have been through."

"Of course. I bet mom wasn't even the problem. You are the problem."

I could not listen anymore and ran up to my bedroom.

I opened the cupboard which contained my blades. I picked out my pocket knife, walked into the washroom and locked the door. I stripped out of my pants, with hands shivery and only one thought in my head, I am always the problem. I cut my thighs and continued till I felt light-headed. My last thought, after the door broke, was that I did the same thing I did after he left.

Xavier' s POV

It's killing me not knowing what happened to Addy. We all left her with Xander because they have similar personalities and understand each other. We know Xander is closest with Addy but with their similar personalities, comes their stubbornness and Xander's 'speaking without thinking'. The more I think about this, the more I feel it's a bad idea. My train of thought is lost when Xander slams the door and angrily storms into the closet. He comes out in his hoodie and sweatpants and says, "I'm going to the gym".

I immediately get up and run to Addy's room. She is nowhere to be seen but the bathroom is locked. I knocked and called out her name multiple times but she did not answer. I waited and waited till I could not anymore and broke the door.

End Of Chapter