Don't Let Things Die [L.S]

2016

2016

During this specific jump in time was when I actually stopped to think about what I was doing.
Wasn't it weird to see your past go by in just a few fragments of memory?
Was this even happening?

Has it happened to another person apart from me?
Did those people change anything that involved me and I never noticed?
What if Harry had to do the same?
What if the memories were already changed by him?

My mind was full of questions all of a sudden, and for a moment they made me forget about what I was about to experience.

2016.

The only year I really didn't want to relive.

"Ems?" - I grabbed her arm to stop her before the memory started rolling.

"What?"

"Did any other person have this same opportunity as I did?"

"They might have. I don't know, I'm just your conscience, not others." - She shrugged.

"Mmmm." - I hummed.

"I can assure you though, that these memories hadn't been altered before. I know that, I've been there."

"Uh, okay." - I nodded.

"Do you need a moment?" - She asked, and now I finally realized where we were and that Emily had frozen the memory before it even began.

We were in my house. My house at that time, at least. The one I sold after I decided to leave it all behind and move back to Doncaster, before I decided to disappear from the public eye.

"No, go ahead." - I said, taking a deep breath.

Waiting wasn't going to make this any better.

My younger self was lying in the middle of the large and almost empty room, on the carpeted floor, as a footy game was playing on the tv, muted.
All the lights were out except for the huge tv on the wall.
Young Louis was on his side, a bottle of -probably- vodka in one hand and with the other he was trying to roll a joint, not quite getting it right due to his wasted state.

He groaned, hitting the bottle against the floor out of frustration for not getting it done. On the other side of his body, I could see a tiny bag containing white powder inside, not far from it, a credit card shining under the light of the tv and a line of the same powder right next to it.

I didn't even remember this moment, and I wasn't surprised, since I barely remember anything that happened this year.

"What month is this, Ems?" - I whispered.

"April."

"Fuck."

Emily nodded, sighing. We both turned to look at his miserable state again.

Then his phone rang, the screen lighting up and illuminating part of the dark room near the -also empty- bookshelf.

Young Louis first ignored it, he ignored the first seven times it rang.
Then, giving up, he stood up and stumbled on his feet until he finally found the phone.
I walked towards it too, looking over my younger self's shoulder to see the screen.

Three missed calls from Mum.
Two missed calls from Lottie.
Two missed calls from Oli.
One incoming call from Harry Styles.

Young Louis accepted the call and laughed into the speaker.
The room was quiet and secluded enough that I could hear Harry's quiet breathing on the line even if it wasn't on speaker.