My Strange Addiction

13

Y/N began 8th grade a happy and care free girl. She didn't know the things that await her later in life. She was 12 years old and couldn't be happier. It was finally the last year of middle school and she was so excited to start the journey of being a young woman . But something felt off. She noticed that while every was developing feelings for different boys and such, but she didn't. Typically she had a crush on a different boy in her class each year, but this was her second year not liking any of the boys in her class. She thought she had to have a crush so she began trying to force herself to have feelings for different guys but it didn't work. She began questioning herself and wondering why. Soon after her 13th birthday she began questioning her sexuality. She didn't think she was a lesbian but she didn't think she was straight either. Her family never had these kinds of talks and never exposed her to the lgbtq+ community. She didn't even know there was more than sexualities than just gay and straight. She didn't know what was happening but she often found herself often being transfixed by women and womanly things in ways that weren't typical for other girls she knew. She would think about kissing her female friends and loves the feeling that she got when girls would hug her and compliment her. She wanted to be loved by girls in a way that she hadn't before. These feelings drove her to do research as to why she felt the way she felt, because she still found some guys attractive but she also found girls attractive. After a long time of researching she came to the conclusion that she was bisexual. She was terrified once she found out and didn't fully accept herself. She was scared of someone finding out and telling her family. Her family had always expressed their disapproval of the lgbtq+ community and so did the church. She was scared