Fifty Shades of Romanoff (fanfic)

22

I awoke the next day to an empty bed as all of last nights events replayed in my mind. I checked the time realizing I had slept in and was gonna be late for our flight back. Why hadn't Romanoff woke me up I have no idea but it kinda pissed me off because it made me look irresponsible.

I quickly scrambled up getting dressed as I attempted to call Romanoff but it went straight to voicemail every time. What the hell?

I pushed through the hotel doors being met with the Paris air as I took a moment to appreciate the fact I was able to visit the beautiful city. However my moment was cut short by a car honking at me, the back window rolled down as I was met with Romanoffs face. She had glasses covering her emerald eyes but I could still feel them glaring at me even behind the thick rimmed glasses. I took a deep breath not really sure what I was in for once I stepped into that car. The driver took my bag as I slowly crawled in beside the red head who had turned her face back out the front window not even glancing at me. I was about to be in for a rude awakening and I don't think I was ready for it.

My leg anxiously bounced the whole car ride as I snuck small glances in her direction. She hadn't payed me any attention and it only made my stomach twist more in anticipation.

Don't get me wrong last night was amazing and I think deep down Romanoff knows that too, but considering how closed off she's acting I don't think our moment is going to carry over from last night.

I followed a few feet behind Romanoff as she took a seat, I could feel the odd tension in the air and so I took a seat on the far side of the jet giving myself some time away from her. I knew she was my boss and she knew I was her assistant but was she really going to just shut out everything we had done last night.

I ended up dozing off the entire flight after being exhausted from the night before, of course with my luck once the flight had landed back at the office I had been too busy sleeping to even notice Romanoff was already leaving.

She didn't even bother waking me up.

I awkwardly grabbed my luggage and stepped out the plane going down to my office by myself. Although I was hiding it pretty well, I was hurting inside and I didn't know how to feel. I mean last night Natasha had showed me a new side to her and I had thought we were finally getting somewhere with our relationship but now I'm not sure what to think of our situation. So going back to work we were back at square one, possibly doing even worse than we were before.

"Y/n?" I looked up from my desk seeing Wanda looking down at me. I dropped my pen that was in my hand from doodling in a scrap peice of paper as I gave her my full attention.

"Hey Wanda."

"Y/n why are you still here, Natasha left like an hour ago, you can go home." I glanced over at her office trying to wrap my head around the fact I hadn't even seen her walk out.

"She left?" I looked back at Wanda as she tried to hold in a chuckle at my cluelessness.

"Go home, you've had a long day." She gives me a small smile before heading down the hall.

I groaned putting my head on the desk. I needed a drink, a nap and a shower.

It was around nine at night when I finally opened the door to my apartment heading into the warm comfort of my home. I plopped my bag on the floor as I got a nice long shower before pouring myself some wine and putting on the television.

I had drank basically the whole bottle of wine as I attempted to drown out how fucked up my life had gotten. I mean first I somehow get a job at a business firm, then I sleep with my boss and have this weird sexual relationship with her and now after rocking her world she's completely shut me out. To say my ego was bruised would be an understatement.

I had poured the last of my wine gulping it down before getting ready to sleep, my body felt heavy with exhaustion as I let out a yawn.

A knock at the door practically gave me a heart attack considering it was almost midnight by now and I wasn't expecting any company.

Great, on top of all my worries I'm also about to get murdered in my own home.

I tried ignoring the knocking until it happened again this time louder and more aggressive. I sighed as I dragged my feet along the wood floors making my way to my front door.

I unlocked the door and swung it open curious as to who was on the opposite side.

Romanoff

I slammed the door in her face as I walked to my room.

"Y/n" I hadn't bothered locking it assuming she would let herself in anyway.

"Y/n wait I want to talk" her voice wavered as I heard her footsteps follow behind me.

"I don't wanna talk." I said with no emotion in my voice knowing I had finished a whole bottle of wine and wasn't fully conscious of my thoughts.

"Would you just stop." She grabbed my wrist turning me around to face her in the hallway. I just stared at her with an unimpressed look on my face. She had no right to show up here unannounced and expect that I want to see her after how disrespectful she was towards me today.

It was then that I finally noticed her disheveled appearance. She had mascara smudged under her eyes, her hair was falling out of a once neat updo and she was dressed down in sweats and a sweater.

After finally giving her the light of day and finally willing to listen it seemed as if she hadn't prepared on what to say. Her mouth opening and closing as I watched the gears in her head turn attempting to form a sentence.

"I-I don't know why I'm here."

That's it? That's all she could say after showing up at my house and interrupting my night.

"Okay then leave." I walked past her towards the kitchen hearing her follow. I poured myself a glass of water as I took a seat at the counter.

"I shouldn't have shut you out like that." She sighed as she sat opposite me. "It's just, we had a deal." She looks down at the counter as I watch her struggle with any form of an apology. "It wasn't supposed to get this complicated and after last night..."

"It's fine it was just a silly game, a one time thing it doesn't have to mean anything." She looked up at my words.

"You don't want it to mean anything?" Her eyebrows scrunched together. I swallowed down my feelings taking a sip from my glass before meeting her hard gaze. "No it doesn't have to mean anything, whatever happened in Paris will stay there, I honestly couldn't care less about you at this point." I watched disappointment flash her features as her eyes glossed over. I knew my words were harsh but it was better this way, we've made a mess of things and it was time to put our lust for each other behind us and move on with our lives. Our relationship is way too complicated to build anything off from it.

"Okay" I could hear hurt lace her words as she turned her head away from me.

"Natasha I think you should leave." I softened my tone as I walked to my front door opening it for her. She slowly walked past me with her head down, her hands fiddling with themselves as she tried to hold herself together. "I'm sorry" was the last thing she said before I shut the door letting all my emotions out.

I slid down the door as tears flooded down my face breaking down. I didn't know what I felt for Natasha but I knew I deserved better than whatever she was giving me. So yes, maybe I broke the Natasha Romanoff but I also had to heal my own heart and that wasn't gonna happen unless I let her go.