Miitopia x reader

Dark Lord x Villain! Reader

(Okay yes the reader is a villain, I couldn't think of anything more fitting. This will also be the default for my other stuff unless specified otherwise in a headcannon)
Also, this is 1st person
I was walking around Miitopia, as it was a rather peaceful day. Now trust me, i do live for the chaos, but every once in a while i needed a break. Now, I've heard of this "Dark Lord" guy, he's been the one thing everyone's been talking about. I've heard of his deeds but I'm not mad or see him as competition. In fact, I see him as an ally. You see, miis are completely defenseless and can't be witnesses if they have no face, plus when they disappear, everyone just assumes something bad happened while they were faceless, or at least that was my first thought. But after about a month, I realized just how carried away I've been. Because someone was getting slightly suspicious of all of these "accidents". Sophie. So I have an enemy now. Yay. Though last week was a close one. One drop of blood and it would have been all over. So that's where I am now. Just wandering around, taking a break. It's been pretty nice, I guess.
Or at least until now. As I was walking about a kilometer outside of the greenhorne town, I saw something? Someone? Wait no, that's Stan, the dark lord guy everyone's been talking about. Heheh, I can tell it'll be fun to piss him off. I mean what's he gonna do, steal my face ¯\_(ツ)_/¯?
"Hm? Who's this puny human? I've never seen you before." The dark lord said. Nice, I already have something offensive to start us off. "First of all, I'm not puny, your probably not even 5 feet tall but are high elevated" I responded. "you have some nerve kid. AND I AM A NICE 5'11 THANK YOU" He said. You could hear the anger in his voice. I tried to hold in my laughter. He was fun to offend 😃. "Idk, that's still kinda sho-" I said before being cut off. "HEY DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM? I-" "did not ask" I said. And he responded with "HEY!!! NOW AT THIS POINT IM GETTING PISSED! WHO THE HELL YOU THINK YOU ARE!" This is even more entertaining then I thought! A good cure for the boredom I've felt for the past week. And then I broke down laughing. "AHAHAHAHAHA-YOUR-HAHA-REACTION-*WHEEZE*-TO MY TROLLING WAS -PFTHAHADHJSHSMAIJAKSIDHDJD" I could physically feel his anger. Okay, I've had my fun. I should probably get down to business thought
I quickly went behind him and I jumped up on him, Thankfully I'm h/t so it was easy, and slid one of my knifes (with blood still on it) near where his neck would be if he had one. "Okay listen, I've had my fun now listen to me. Also, try anything funny and..." I said as I slid the knife 3 cm closer to him (it was 6 cm away from him before). " Now listen, I've heard of you from a few friends of mine, and in case you couldn't tell from the knife, I'm an undercover villain." I said as I went back in front of him. " I just so happened to notice how what you do works in my favor"
"What the hell do you want"
"To team up"
"But you literally tried to kill me"
"I was making sure you weren't gonna try to attack me"
"Why?"
"Because you're a villain? I wasn't born yesterday I know how they act"
"Okay but what do I get in return"
"Well you get to keep the faces, since if the body is dead then where's the face gonna go?"
"And how can I be sure your not gonna kill me...?"
"I promise i won't try to kill you...?"
"Do I look like i was born yesterday?"
"Yes"
"YOU LITTLE-"
"okay okay! Look, I'll leave my weapons at my house whenever we meet up, how does that sound?"
"Hmph. Fine. But only so I don't get killed!"
"Okay okay! I get it. I'll go home"
"Wait you have a home?"
"Of course I- wait never mind I sleep at inns"
"..."
"🥺"
"OKAY FINE! You can visit my place! But it's only temporary and your sleeping across the castle from me!"
"Okay 🥹"
So that went a little better than expected. Though he's still salty about the joke I made about his height.
DARK LORD STAN'S POV
that little bitch! I'm definitely getting forced into this situation because I don't want her to stab my in the middle of the night!
Y/N's POV
"Uh btw, where IS your castle"
"It's... hidden by magic. I'll teleport us there"
So one second I'm in greenhorne, the next I'm in the middle of a castle in a fucking volcano. Though it's nice and warm here, which is good. Then the dark lord began talking "Alright you're here. Now listen; don't try to come after me with any weapon, I have a crap ton-" " for fucks sake, just say shit" "... as I was saying, I have a shit ton of monsters in here who act as my guards. So try anything funny and they'll smite you to pieces" "okay, okay i got it! Which reminds me, where am I sleeping?" "I don't know! Figure it out... uh..." "y/n" "I'm just gonna call you bitch cause that what you are" "WHAT!?" "YOU HEARD ME! anyways, bitch, your room would be somewhere over there" he said, pointing to a wall. Bitch, what 😀🔫
"It's just a wall..." -y/n
"WELL NO SHIT SHERLOCK!" -Stan
"HOW TF AM I SUPPOSED TO SLEEP ON A WALL?" -y/n
"I don't know, I'll tape you there!" -Stan
"Why would you-" -y/n
"Because where the fuck else would you sleep! Cause you sure as hell ain't sleeping with me yet" -Stan
"Wait what 😳" -y/n
"... YOU KNOW WHAT I MEANT!!" -Stan
"Still, you could have worded that differently" -y/n
"SHUT THE HELL UP! Listen, as of right now you have nowhere to to sleep here so on the wall it is!" -Stan
"OKAY OKAY! But will I at least get a room soon?" -y/n
"YES YES! BUT UNTIL THEN, YOU ARE SLEEPING TAPED ON THE WALL!" -Stan
"Okay okay, jeez. No need to yell"
"YOU WERE YELLING TOO!"
"This argument is pointless and it's almost 10 o'clock."
"What, going to bed? Already?"
"Yes..?"
"Pussy"
"YOU ASSHOLE! ITS NOT MY FAULT I WAS BORN HUMAN, UNLIKE YOU!"
"bold of you to assume i was born"
"Wait what?"
"I just spawned here"
"I- ..."
"Alright, if you're 'sO tIrEd', then go ahead over to the wall, I'll get the tape"
"Wait you weren't kidding?"
"Do I look like the type of person who would joke around?"
"Kinda"
"WELL THE ANSWER IS NO!"
"Okay okay 😂. You get the tape, I'll stand over near the wall 😂"
"Okay. The fuck is wrong with this kid"
"I HEARD THAT! AND I AM (age), THANK YOU VERY MUCH!"
"STILL A CHILD TO ME!"
"THAN WHY DONT YOU TELL ME HOW OLD YOU ARE"
"OVER 150 YEARS"
"oh"
And like he said, he came back with 3 things of duct tape, pinned my against the wall so I was sideways and taped me using all 3 rolls of tape. "Alright goodnight, now don't bother me again until 9 o'clock tomorrow morning!" He said before teleporting away, and I fell asleep after a few minutes.