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"No... it's enough" you said with your mouth full of food. Halmeoni was feeding you lunch. "Just one more" she said, but you were shaking your head as a no. She sighed before keeping the food tray away from you. "Take these after 10 minutes" she said, handing you the tablets. "Sure, halmeoni" you said, covering yourself with the blanket.
Taking the stuff, she walked away from your room, while you watched her leave. She locked the door. You filled your lungs with the air, breathing heavily in and out. It was you. Again. Alone. You tilted your head and saw the painted wall of your room. It was a painting of a top hill grassland, looking breathtakingly beautiful under the moonlight.
If there was some extra power in you, you just wished to spend into the wall and next thing was you would be standing on the grassland. How badly you wanted to go there and disappear yourself from the so called life. You sighed. you could never do that. You knew.
Your mind was going blank, you really didn't think anything making you stare at the wall for so long. That's when a click on the door knob made you turn to the door. As the person stepped inside, your face instantly glowed up.
Who else could it be? It was Jimin.
"Hey" he smiled, you couldn't hold back from returning his smile back to him. That smile of his was so precious that you wished to hold it in your palms and hide it from anyone. Only you wanted to see that smile. Only you.
"You didn't take the tablets, huh?" he chided, his eyebrows furrowed, pointing the pills on your lap. "I'm gonna have it now. Don't scold me already" you said, taking the water bottle. Gulping down the water, you took the pills while Jimin was staring at you non stop. You showed your thumbs up at him, making him chuckle.
"Good, so you want anything?" he questioned, sitting on the bed in front of you. "No, I'm full" you smiled at him. He hummed before coming close to your face. You almost jumped at the sudden closeness but stayed right there until he placed the back of his hand on your forehead to check the temperature.
"Better" he said, still with his hand on your forehead. "Y-yeah. You were there, halmeoni was there. You never really left me alone" you sadly chuckled. More than anyone, you wanted your mother's presence. Even though she wasn't your real mother, you just wanted her by your side, ask you the same things at least.
He sighed. He knew what you meant. Even though you never really talk about what you didn't have, he understands. That's how he was. He knows you even before you say. And that made you fall for him even more. How can you not?
He clicked his tongue and placed his palm on your cheek. His warm hand on your burning cheek. Not because of the fever though. His calloused thumb slightly caressed your cheek, making your skin burn more. Your eyes weren't able to look at the flawless boy in front of you. They were everywhere but not him. Like you would actually melt at his stares.
"It's okay. We are here for you, hmm?" he said, his words making you stare at him with your doe eyes. "We are here. I am here." he uttered, his words sounded so strong, making you gulp. "Really?" you questioned, you wanted him to answer right away. Your question was not a simple one. You knew the meaning behind it. He knew it as well. You wanted him to answer that certain question of yours in the same way it was questioned.
"Yeah, YN" he smiled.
Holy cow.
Can't you control your smile now?
No way in a million years.
You came closer and pulled him into a tight hug. He was taken back but he knew something like this would be coming. Your arms were wrapping him tightly that would make his bone break into pieces. It was so tight yet gentle as your chin was leaning on his shoulder. He really liked it.
His arms slowly encircled you, giving you his bear hug. Your smile widened more. You stayed there. Right there for a few minutes. You both didn't want to back off and break the precious hug of yours. Rather, you just wanted to stop the time and stay like that for years.
With half heart, he broke the hug, staring at you with his eyes that were saying something you couldn't read. Your hands fell on your lap, fisting them into balls. If you don't hold back, you will hug him again. Your eyes never really left him. You saw him getting up from your bed, standing in front of you, hands inside his pockets.
Was he also holding back?
"Take rest- um, off I go." he muttered, stepping back from you. He was still facing you. "Yeah" you said, but you wanted to say more. "Bye" he said, turning back to the door, opening it. You gulped seeing him leaving. But the next instance, he turned back. "Call me, okay?" his finger pointed at you. "If you need anything-" adding that, he smiled before stepping away completely, leaving you all alone again in your room.
You hated the locking sound of your door at this point. You just hated it. Huffing heavily, you laid on your bed. Eyes back to the painted wall. Same thoughts ran inside your head again.
Not again.
You covered yourself under the blanket. But your stares at the wall got interrupted when your phone rang. You checked it without any delay. An instant smile crept on your lips. It was him. Jimin. Again.
You texted him back right away. Well, that was how it should be. Couldn't go away from each other but stay together in either means of communication.
That was all you wanted. That was all he wanted too.
