No Talking, Nor Speaking

lvi.

Kyle's POV

"Where is she?!"

The woman at the desk looks frightened at my tone.

"Sir, if you would please calm down-"

I slam my hands on the desk.

"Don't tell me to calm down when the girl I love is in a hospital, when I don't even know what happened to her. Don't you dare tell me to fucking calm down."

The woman's eyes get wide.

"Sir, I understand this is a tough time for you right now, but you are scaring the people around you. So if you would please tell me who you are, who you are here for and calmly take a sit in the waiting area, that'd be great."

I sigh, then run my hands down my face and through my hair.

Be calm, for Jamie.

"I'm Kyle Hoper. I'm here for Jamie Ann Lindane. I'm her, partner."

The woman types some things on her computer, and then smiles and points to the waiting room.

I walk over, and sit in a chair.

This is gonna take a while, I know it.

But, I here for Jamie now and that's all that matters.

"Kyle?"

I look to my left, only to see Jamie's dad.

"Hi, Mr. Lindane."

He shakes his head, and sits down next to me.

"Call me, David."

I nod, and try to give him a light smile.

But, I can't and he notices.

"Don't hurt yourself, boy."

I nod my head again.

It's quiet between us for awhile, but then David says something I'll never forget.

"I'm glad she found you, Kyle. I'm glad she has you in her life."

I look over to him, and give him a grim but happy look.

"I'm glad I have her too, David. I'm really glad I have her in my life, too."

He looks at me in pain.

"Thank you for taking care of her, when my wife and I couldn't.

I notice how he puts emphasis on 'wife and I' and nod my head.

He pats me on the back with the same sad, pained look in his eyes.

"I have somethings to ask you. A question and a favor."

I nod my head, telling him to go on.

He pauses for a moment, and looks at me.

"Why'd you leave? Why did you leave her alone, when everything was just beginning to look okay for her?"

I look away from his eyes, no longer able to handle the deep emotions running through his irises.

"I don't know if she ever told you this but, I have BDD. Also known as Body Dysmorphic Disorder. I can't even look at myself without seeing a flaw."

He nods his head, still confused.

So, I go on.

"Why do you think I never judged her, like others did?"

He stares at me in udder surprise.

"They judged her?"

I nod grimly.

"They did."

He starts to clench his fists, as tears start to form in his eyes.

"I never judged her because I knew what it was like, I knew what it all was like. I had anorexia, too. Not for the same reasons, though. I had it because I thought I was the worlds biggest teenage boy on earth, and that I was ugly and no one would ever love me."

David looks at me with pity in his eyes, but I ignore it and go on.

"Jamie had-, no. Jamie has it, because she came to the conclusion that she can't handle food without Ky. That's why she doesn't eat, or at least eat that much. Her brain has been processed to think that, and that's why she can't eat her food. She just thinks she can't handle it. She thinks that it's because of the images of the car crash. It's not."

David looks as if I just told him the secret to everything.

He's amazed with shock.

"Wow, Kyle. I never could of ever imagined that was the reason. You must have been thinking about that for a long time now."

I nod, because I have.

"So, what's the favor?"

I wanna get straight to the point.

"Oh, the favor. Right."

He pauses for a second, and then continues.

"Can you make sure that nothing happens to my daughter, again. I mean, things that she physically causes herself. Can you make sure of that?"

I stare at him for the longest time.

Jamie has his eyes.

Round and, blue.

"Sure, David. I'll try, too."

He grimly smiles, and goes to Mrs. Lindane who's at the front desk.

I'm not sure if I should have excepted that favor.

Cause it really just sounds like a promise, I'm not sure I'm willing to make.