The Revelation

Chapter 10

ASHLEY

 As the cab raced towards its destination, all pretense of the forced calmness and control that I had been maintaining the entire day fell apart, leaving me exposed.

           

 I had tried to act confident in front of Mike...tried to act as if I had control over the situation; that I could handle it...but the truth was far from it. The truth was that internally I was experiencing raw fear—fear, the likes of which I had never experienced before—not even on the most dangerous missions I had undertaken. It was probably because I had nothing to lose then– well, except for my own life; but that thrill and adventure of putting my life at stake was challenging...the adreline that coursed through each nerve at that point was intoxicating.

           But today...today the fear was for what I feared to lose. If anyone else got hurt...it would be on my hands. I would have to live knowing that it was entirely my fault if something happens now. I had known all along that they would try to break me and get to me through my family; only that I had never expected it to come so soon.

            In fact, a part of my mind had been contemplating on telling them the truth. They would probably have detested me...or been repulsed by me...or maybe horrified at what I had done. I had even wondered for a second if they would turn me in to the police. Surely not; but I would take that chance any day now...well, it was better and definitely more preferable than to have them find out the truth about me in this way...by them...

               I wondered what they had in mind for me. There were two options they were likely to explore...Did they plan on killing me in front of my parents...so that I would die knowing what they would see and remember it for the rest of their lives. Or were they planning on murdering them in front of me...slow torture for me as I would watch on helplessly...knowing that it was all my fault – that I was responsible for it. I had seen it both ways with them.   

Either way, I wouldn't come out of it...that I was sure of. Maybe I could take out as many of theirs before they put me down. At least then, it would be worth it – at least then I could accept my death gladly; knowing that I had tried to redeem myself. But was more deaths really the answer?

          I looked out once. I was halfway to my destination now. Every second, my heart urged me to turn around and run in the opposite direction...people called it the survival instinct...I acknowledged the feeling but mastered it as well. It was simply because there was nowhere to run to. I knew that I couldn't raise my gun against them. My people were at their mercy. I would just have to walk in unarmed and let them take me, well, at least until I could do something to get my parents out.

            As I prepared myself for the fate that awaited me, I was glad that I had got a chance to say a silent goodbye to my brother, but at the same time regretted the way I had behaved with Maria. Now I might never get a chance to apologize. True, Maria had driven me over the edge, but I had said a lot of hurtful things. But there was nothing I could do now.

More than anything, I wished James would not be there to witness things as they developed. I did not know what would happen...but if it ended up in torture, I would be able to endure longer if I knew James was not witnessing it...witnessing them break me slowly.

          Once again within a span of 24 hours, I stood near my destination. As always, the place had a deserted look to it; but as is often the case, this place hid dark things in their bowels though only a small and innocent looking part of it remains visible to the outside world. I got out and paid the cab driver. He quickly drove away without a backward glance. I couldn't blame him for that. People rarely ventured in this area. I had got down on the AH-45 highway. I took the small branch that lead off the main highway and within minutes stood before the building I had visited just the previous night; though the situation between these two visits could not have been more different.