Chapter one

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I walked into a local bar, one where I could technically count as a regular, finishing my fourth and last year of college. Most of the other students frequent this bar because of the close proximity it has to campus, which justifies the large crowd. Today is the one month anniverary of being single. My boyfriend at the time and I were highschool sweethearts, and we both decided to go to the same college for that reason. 

We were out to celebrate a recent win at his latest basketball game, but I weren't feeling to well that night. Deciding not to hold him back, I went home alone while he went to party with his other teammates. I was feeling a small bump beginning to form in my belly, and I was extremely excited to tell him. I found out earlier that day, and knowing that he would be fine with keeping and raising the little one, I was floating on my own little pink cloud the entire day. I was honestly just surprised that he didn't notice. The mood swings, the morning sickness and wierd cravings were all something that he commented on, but he never seemed to connect the dots. Niether did I, to be honest. My period had always been inconsistent, and he was always complaining about my moddswings and such. Like when I got really excited and began to rant about things, he simply shushed me and shook his head. I would always write it off as him having a bad day, but guess not. And when I would get upset, he would teel me to quit being so dramatic. In my defence, he had always seemed like a voice of reason inside my head. To relax, not talk to loud, and such would only seem like self-improvement. If I could get a glow-up with my personality, surely people would like me more, right?

At the time, us not being together, would be impossible. We were perfect for each other, right? I couldn't wait to start a family with him, maybe get married one day, get a dog from a shelter, move in to a small house to raise a little girl or boy in. Perhaps I would get pregnant soon again, and we needed to move into a larger house, and the staying in that house for the next fifty years, before going to the same retirement home together and die holding hands. I was truly prepared for all of that with him.  - The need of being loved and seen made me blind to all of his, to others, red flags.  - When I returned home from that celebration, I quickly got ready for bed and prepared to surprise him the next morning. I decorated the tiny broomcloset of a room, or as we liked to call it, the guest bedroom. The only thing that would fit was a single twin bed, that you could access by crawling in from the foot of the bed. We should have used it for storage, but he had had an extra bed for some reason. His parents worked their entire life to send him to college, but that meant they couln't afford most other things.  The small banner from the drugstore and the positive test and a pacifier placed in the middle, like some kind of prize.I always slept with earplugs, because I was a light sleeper, but that night, I was feeling so tired, went to bed without them. He knew. He knew I always slept with them. 

The noises of quiet giggling woke me up. Smiling, thinking he was home, I soon realized that the sounds was not from something that his mouth could ever produce. And the fact that he was shushing the feminine voice outside the bedroom. The door opened to the tiny bedroom where the surprise was with a familiar creak. A tear rolled down my cheek, when I realized that the surprise was not being moved, and with the small moans that followed. He was fucking her on top of my positive pregnancy test. He was fucking her, fucking me over, and fucking up the entire life we built and our happy future together. Then I realized the bed was becoming wet, and I had a horrible stomach ache. I looked under the thin sheet drenced in sweat and blood.  Getting out of bed, I had for the first time in my life felt nothing, thought nothing and as black dots invaded my vision, the only thing I could sense was the salty tears on my toungue.

I ran out of my apartment, grabbing only my phone and keys to our shared car. He didn't even notice that I left. As I sat down in my car, the keys in my hand began to jingle. I looked down. I was shaking, violently so. As the gravity of the night, all emotions came crashing down on me. Driving to the hospital alone while bleeding, and ruining the drivers seat should have been uncomfortable, but my physical needs was not something that came to mind. Only the loss and the huge hole forming in my chest, suffocating me.

Walking into the bar, I felt pitying eyes from people who knew only that he cheated. In some way, I'm thankful that is all they know. I don't know if I could ever show my face in public again. As I went to grab my first drink of the night, I saw my ex stamding with some new girl on his arm, seemingly celebrating another win for the team. "Your gin & tonic, miss" the bartender said and snapped me out of my trance. I nodded and threw a fake smile and took a sip of the rather bitter drink. Suddenly I could see my ex making his way towaeds me, and I backed over and into the vast croud of the dance floor. Suddenly I bumped into something hard. Whipping my head around and craing my neck to meet a man with mezmerising blue eyes and dark hair. I guess my panic showed on my face and he instantly looked confused and worried.

"Whoah, hey, do you need help? I'm Alexander."
"I'm Angel, and yes, well, not really. You see, someone I used to know seems like he wants to talk and I really, really, DON'T want that, can you help?"

A/N: Tell me what you think of this! I have been wanting to write something different and not a fanfic for a while now.

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⏰ Last updated: Nov 13, 2022 ⏰

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