Honestly, I don't know where to begin. Or what was the starting point. Maybe the times when I've searched p0rn on TV, or fantasied "playing" with same gender. That's why I called this chapter "Early times". I'll tell all my experience. You may not agree with me, or say that I'm lying, or call me dirty-minded. Most people say that, homo feelings are fictional and you're just horny not bi, but the thing, which is made from nothing, cannot be fictional.
And it sounds unimaginable. But everything is natural, because in that time, my family had only just TV with some national channels. Seeing these from Internet was impossible. So, let's start.
As long ago as I know myself, masculinity of men addicted me too much. If you have some feelings to men, you'll understand. And it never changed. I remember that, some hosts, which I saw on TV, even ex president J.Bush also performed some "little things" in my dreams too. But the ridiculous part is that, I've never imagined their private parts. Even now my partner's body looks me hotter than other things. Like they've always been. Also a guy from series called "Foreign son-in-law", who got robbed and stayed only with underwear, almost made my core memory for that age. I even remember rising b0n3r when started thinking about it.
I would like to share a little story too. When I was 7, we went to shopping with our cousins to prepare their wedding. I saw a stand, full of underwears. As you know, they always have a picture of the man with something huge inside that cloth on it. Without even knowing what actually it is, I felt not horny, but really high from the impulse it gave. I've watched several times, because never seen that much boxes at the same time. It was weird and gay, but strong feeling. Years and years I've continued staring boxes at different shops. Even now.
At the same year, I went to school. From the first day, all my teachers saw that I'm pretty much different than whole class. All my notes were excellent, discipline was perfect. But, it was a public school, so toilets were awful. No doors and without gender. Several times my male classmate wanted to see my "thing", but I wasn't interested. I felt sorry when I grow up, that couldn't use that privilege. But some months later I saw a guy's who was older than me and my heart almost stopped from that. Maybe I started realize that, there's actually something inside. Despite I felt too much, never did something openly. After finishing 4th grade, I've changed school.
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Born as Bi
Non-FictionWhile being bisexual may seem easy and versatile, it's not at all for most of them and that's worse if you're living in the most homophobic country of Europe - Azerbaijan Quick note: This is not a story, just feelings and thoughts what I've lived:)
