Jensoo - Heart Forecast

Part 4

Jennie's POV

Sitting at my mini studio, that's almost my routine nowadays. I always put my thoughts or any lyrics in a small notebook, so whenever I'm feeling to write another song, I will always start there. Anything that come across my mind, I'll have it written there. It's like a diary but it's not personal, it's just something that I want to share but I couldn't just simply say out loud. You could say it's kind of therapy for me, and it pretty much helping out on how I cope with myself.

It's hard, but it's better now. When I think about it again, she never make it easy at the first place, I always feel loved by her till everything feels right, how hard to stay mad at her antics, how stupid was I to miss her when she's not around, how comfortable we were around each others' family. But the hardest thing was when she left. All those promises left with her, I got nothing left with me except for my feeling. Why doe she have to be a coward for not confessing earlier, how stupid I can be for keep denying whatever I felt towards her. If we make a move earlier than it was, would things change?

If anything, I wouldn't wish this love on anybody else, because I know how hard it is and I'm shutting down myself. As time passing by, things will get better they said, and it did.. but I still remember you, does remembering someone can be considered as missing someone? One thing for sure, missing someone whom isn't there is harder than to feel rejected, unnoticed, jealousy, even my period pain can't put a fight. Will I be able to love again? To be loved that feels like yours again?

****

While waiting for Seulgi to fetch me, I feel bittersweet holding onto that small notebook of mine. Looking at the ring on my finger feels more silly cause I have to put it on me by myself, feeling un-claim, yet feels right, anything about her feels right. Maybe this, being like this is the right thing, not good but not bad. When I heard my phone ring, I know that's Seulgi, she must have arrived. I'm pretty sure she thought that I'm still sleeping or still getting ready. For no reason, I just want to be extra early for today or maybe I'm getting sick of Seulgi's nagging whenever I'm late. She such a punctual nerd.

****

We currently in the main studio, me and the music producers discussing about my new incoming songs. Nothing really particular, same old this and that. That's when the door was open by someone, a rather big guy, holding a few drinks in his hand. Even he's wearing a mask, I could see he's smiling under it while passing us the drinks. I'm a bit confused when he said he's the assistant, because my boss clearly said it will be a woman. While feeling a bit distracted, a women enter through the door, she must be one of the staffs too since she's wearing a mask, with her hands full with some kind foods.

"PD-nim, I brought in your order. Sorry for running late, the queue was long. You guys must be hungry already, here, please enjoy your foods." She put the foods on the table at our back where we usually taking a break. With her presence, I can't seem to say anything, I just look at her. Through her gestures, she's having a conversation with someone in the room, but I can't seem to hear anything, everything passes like a movie on mute.

Then she come up to me, I can see that she keep saying something under her mask and she's holding her hand up to shake mine. But I still can't hear anything, I can't move but looking at her eyes, alike but different vibe I said to myself. "Jennie, are you okay?" I heard someone asked me, that's when things turn normal but I keep looking at her and she draw her hand back. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't do that. My name is Sooya, new hired manager and I'll be under you from now on." She said. So this is Sooya, well she doesn't seem rude as boss said. "And I'm Bohyun, the assistant. Please let us know if you need anything else." The big guy said. Both of them bow to my direction. While still unable to utter a word, I could only bow back to them with a confuse look. I don't even realize that both of them are walking towards the door already.

Brushing whatever that uneasy feeling, we continue with our work. After half an hour, we decided to have our lunch at back table just now. The food was nice, definitely pumps up my energy for later. While eating and having a small conversation, the music PD, our Teddy oppa suddenly said, "You know that two kids just now, they're quite good. Met them 2 days ago and they work like a charm. Straight orders and no problem comes later. Usually new hire will have trouble to follow orders." He nodded his head while eating, a sign of the approval for the food.

Hearing that make me feel at ease because she will be working under me, I'm quite a picky person to start with. "Glad to hear that oppa, boss said she will be in charge of me from now on since Seulgi have to manage the new group." I said to him. "Emm.. but you know.. she looks familiar. Or maybe it's just me, maybe because of my old age now, I keep remembering and forgetting random stuffs. I even looking for my car keys last week, it was in my hand the whole time I was searching for them." We're laughing at his story.