Not A Trophy Wife

Chapter Five

"Savi! Savi, wait a minute," Jayden called after me. A few meters down, he caught up with me.

"I don't want to talk to you," I snapped back.

I was filled with inexplicable anger. I didn't even want to look at him.

"Isn't it a bit early to be jealous?" he asked me with a small smile.

"Don't flatter yourself! You know what? You seemed like a nice guy. But it turns out that you are no different from all men. Cheating bastard!"

Jayden giggled, though he tried to hide it. It made me even more annoyed.

"Leave me alone!" I yelled at him.

He threw his hands up. "Okay. Okay."

I turned and ran back to the motel. I entered the room and slammed the door hard. A fury had welled up in me that I could not control.

"All men are the same!" I shouted.

I grabbed the shopping bag I had left on the bed and threw it against the wall. The bedspread met the same fate. I paced the room like a madman, throwing every object my eyes alighted on. I was pulling my hair out in anger.

"You are all the same! I hate you!" My cries grew louder. "I hate you, Dominic! I hate you! I hate everyone!"

I didn't know exactly how long my tantrum lasted, but there was a knock at the door at some point.

Startled, I turned in the direction of the sound. I tried to straighten my messy hair and opened the door.

Evelyn stood before me. "Are you all right, Savi? I was told that screams were coming from your room."

"Everything is okay. I am sorry," I replied curtly and closed the door.

I leaned my back against it and slid down until I sat on the ground. I thought I was out of tears, but they started to fall again.

I folded my legs and wrapped my arms around them. "I hate you, Dominic," I kept repeating. "Damn you! You and your bitches... Be damned!"

My body trembled uncontrollably. From the cold? Out of pain? Of anger? Of fear? Out of desperation? Or maybe from all the creepy feelings together that completely possessed me.

I reached over, pulled up the bedspread I had thrown on the ground, and wrapped myself in it. I leaned my head back against the door, still crying. I couldn't stop. The hours passed. And I remained curled up on the ground.

There was no strength in me to get up.

Gradually darkness replaced the light. The night came uninvited. And it carried so much more pain with it.

When I'd met Jayden the night before, he'd helped me to stop thinking for a while. But I was alone again, caught in the memories of my lost life.

***

The sun greeted me good morning with its warm rays. But I couldn't enjoy them.

"It's a new day," I whispered to myself and got out of bed. I didn't even know when I'd gotten into it.

I collected the scattered items from the ground and arranged the clothes in the wardrobe.

Then I walked into the bathroom and put the toiletries on the small shelve. I looked in the mirror at my swollen, bloodshot eyes. Do I deserve this? I asked myself.

But perhaps there was no answer to that question.

I washed my face and applied the cheap cream I had bought the day before.