All the Way - an F1 story

37

Heavy topics in this one, including mentions of suicide. Please read at your own risk, and reach out if you need any help. My inbox is a safe space for everyone 💗

15 September, 2021
📍various locations, Italy

"How many more can you give me, Cal?"

She couldn't be serious. Calina's arms were jelly at this point in the workout, and Lella still had more?

"Please," she sighed. Her trainer smirked, loading up another pair of fifteen-pound plates to the bar.

"Come on," Lella chuckled. "This is nothing for you."

"You wanna try?" Calina countered, lying back down on the bench, her hands grasping the bar. Lella shook her head in amusement.

"Ten reps, then you're free."

"What are your plans for the rest of the day?" Lella was packing up when Calina emerged in a fresh, not-sweaty outfit. Why she needed to take things home, Calina didn't know. Lella did own the gym.

"Just an appointment later," her trainer said, shrugging as she went back to her task. "Don't you have a date tonight?"

"Yeah, but I have to go meet Russo for lunch first." Calina had been meaning to see her psychiatrist, she really had, but with all the media and sim the team wanted her to do after the race weekend was ridiculous. Thankfully, other than her morning training, Calina had a free day today, and besides, she really missed Russo.

"I'll leave you to it, then," Lella said, picking her bag up off the floor, her phone going off with messages. "If you'll excuse me, I need to see what my husband is whining about."

Matteo picked up as soon as Calina called, her phone resting between her cheek and shoulder as she piled her bags into the passenger's seat of the Jeep.

"Ma, trovo molto offensivo che non posso vedere la mia ragazza nel mio giorno libero," he sighed. "Appena sono libero, arriva qualcosa di nuovo."

"I—you—Matteo, sono stato via per due ore."

"Ma, oggi hai quel appuntamento con Russo, no?"

"Si, e poi sono tua per il resto della giornata," Calina replied, setting her phone on the centre console beside her. "Va bene per te?"

"Sì. avremo abbastanza tempo per il nostro viaggio."

Calina paused, registering his words, as she pulled out onto the road. She knew Matteo had been planning something, because ever since she had first learned he was taking her out on a date, he hadn't given any more detail other than that, and she was under the impression he meant something like a dinner.

"What—a trip? Matteo, you have training tomorrow morning! What trip?"

"Do not worry about me," he chuckled. "Credo che dopo la gara, tu devi andare a rilassarti un po, Calina."

Calina sighed, but she felt a warmth spread through her at his thoughtfulness. The past weekend had been draining, and maybe whatever he had planned would be good for her.

"Non mi dirai dove stiamo andando, vero?"

"No, e potreste odiarmi per questo. Chi lo sa?"

"Matteo!"

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For probably the first time since Calina had begun working with Russo, the doctor had requested they not meet in her office. For as long as Calina knew, she had been comfortable with sharing what she had to in the privacy of the room, though now she supposed, that with the secrets of her mental health shared out to the world, it probably didn't matter as much.