This is our turn

chapter 4.

(Hello.
The beta reader is the lovely, amazing, smart, wonderfull snarlypinker who is very neat. I <3 her

Tw: implied flashbacks (nothing is detailed, it is said two people have them), eating disorders (i am unsure of the accurate diagnosis but if you want to provide one, you shall), heavy sibling affection (not biological siblings tho), mentions of binding, mentions of unhealthy binding, usually romantic ways of cuddeling, mild mentions of death, mentions of sh, past forced tattoos, past dehumanization, implied human traficking, heavily implied starvation, mentions of gender dysphoria, mentions of sh, heavily implied general child ab/se because Alex is clearly f/cked over by it, mild flirting (not Mori and Sophie level but a decent bit), jealousy, and Kat is not mentioned but sort of implied)

Alex comes back from a cold workday a week later. He decides to take care of a few things. Due to the coldness he gets a old blanket and a pillow out. He has to throw his Oleander away since it seemingly just died, and decides to look what he has in his frigde.

He has bread, pickles and cream cheese. Because his stomach will kill him if not, he decides to make himself a bit of food.

Just as he finished cutting up some pickles his door bursts open.

Bast storms inside. Shes puffed up from crying. Her makeup has partiually been messed up, she seems to wear pyjamas under her coat as its mid november.

"Bast? Whats wrong?" Alex hurries to her as soon as he sees her and hugs her carefully. "Did Natsu hurt you anyhow? Do you need medical help?"

She eventually calmed down from her crying. "She-she mentioned thos-those things, she didnt even realize what she said but I just went into alarm and start seeing and hearing them agaim and it hurts and so I told her id go to your place to calm down and that I will be back and I am so sorry to bug-"

"Shhhh. Lets calm down" he gently rubs her back in circles. He made sure his sister felt well. They may not be blood related, but they view each other as siblings. They dated shortly but quickly realized it just wasnt their feels. They are happier as siblings.

He contiues rubbing those circles until shes calm. She rarely snaps like that, prefering to stay calm in most cases but sometimes it happens. After all, shes a person like all of us are.

"We should eat dinner." They both know he wont eat a normal amount, but Bast knows he will try. "I will make some more" he carefully lets go of her. "You still have some clothes here, for emergencies so you can stay over nigth. We migth have to cuddle to both fit but thats nothing new."

Alex remembers his first few weeks out of that hell. He had to cuddle with Bast almost every nigth, in case he woke up from yet another nigthmare believing he was back there. The nigthmares are still there, but Alex knows hes not there anymore. Luckily. I dont use hell ligthly. I think most of you know that already.

"Nope, thats alrigrh with me."

He makes more bread, which looks rather sad as its bread, with cream cheese and a pickle slice.

"I got some breakfast for tomorow. And we have to stock up on your frigde soon. A 22th birthday is importand. Especially because its your first one really.... free."

"Oh. If you say so." He doesnt really believe her, but he finishes their dinner.

They eat in silence. None says a word. They never do while eating because Alex will distract himself from it.

In the end, Bast eats 4 pieces of bread. Alex eats half of one

After eating, Alex changes and Bast does her last few things, like put a bonnet on her hair for protection while she sleeps. He sees no reason to not do this in front of Bast. He doesnt make any drama out of it, but one can tell he has been through a lot. Despite clear signs of underweigth, theres a overwhelming presence of scars and something inked on his rigth thigh. Both know abbout the tattoo and know its purpose. It was to steal that bits of humanity away, however it couldnt ever get away as Alex will always be a human like anyone else, no matter anyones opinion. Its a so utterly disgusting thing to do to anyone. Even your worst ememy. None deserves it. Ever. A few fresher marks are on his arms, and his wings are absolutly destroyed.

Bast doesnt loose any comments abbout it.
She does commenr on one thing.

"Alex you have to take your binder off. I know for a fact you wore it for more then 12 hours.".

"Fine, but dont look."

He quickly changes, grabbing a large shirt and long shorts. When hes done, Bast already sleeps.

He cuddles next to her and quickly falls in a empty slumber.

Hes awaken by his shrill and loud alarm. It always makes him mildly angry to hear it. Its just too loud. Bast looks to have the same opinion.

He does get up and gets ready like always, knowing Bast has long forgiven Natsu if she even haboured any bad feelings to her. She is already getting ready. "I need to shower again today."

Alex gets ready too. But a certain very familiar feeling makes itself a home in his head. A well known jealousy. Not over the things hes usually jealous of like people beeing able to hear when not yelled at or see clearly or beeing able to admire celebrities or any of that. But of what everyone around him seems to have: love.

Alex had a few relationships, most ending very very badly. Rarely was it his fault, but we know Alex at this point well enough to know he believes so.
Most ended rather graphic aswell.

Natsu rings the doorbell, clearly shaken up. "I am so sorry i never meant to hurt you i didnt know better I am so sorry pleas-"

Bast just hugs the shorter woman. "Dont be sorry. You did nothing wrong. You couldnt have known. I missed you so much"

Natsus purple hand reaches out for Basts dark brown one and holds it gently.

"I love you so much."

"I love you too"

Alex tries to get out of his door. Hes jealous. He is jealous of everyone getting love and affection while he doesnt. He is jealous that everyone is so happy. He is not happy. He wont be anytime soon, he believes. It never was his turn after all. He doesnt want the others to not be happy. He just wishes for a bit himself.
A sad wish, but one I hope he gets fullfilled soon.

(Did anyone miss me?

Also small note: i am open to questions

Onto this chapters questions:
1. Did you like it?
2. Do you feel for anyone?
3. Any questions for any character?
4. Any questions for me?)