The Last Shadow Witch

7. the best friend

"Where's my sister?"

"Other cafeteria,"

"With the others?"

"Mmph mmph," he muffled.

"What?"

"Mmph mmph…"

"Can you not talk with your mouth full?" I snapped. He gulped down what he was eating and licked his lips. My eyes couldn't help but follow the swipe of his tongue.

"So, how was life as a human?"

"Hell."

"Why?"

"If you like being an object of ridicule, sexual harassment and public punching bag, then I guess that would be heaven to you." He nodded. I believe his food was more interesting than the ugly girl sitting across from him. Heck, a fly would be more interesting than the terrible one called me.

"Hmm, how old are you?"

"I'm not having any further conversation with a guy who just pulled out a burger from his briefs, ew."

"Yum, yum, yum," he said, chewing nastily.

"Haven't you heard of hygiene!"

"No, did you make that up?"

"Ace," I whined. How can one human being be so disgusting? Well, he's not human per SE but still! He pulled a burger out from his underwear, his freaking underwear! Am I making any sense here?!

"Babe, my boxers, remember?"

"You can die,"

"Vampire, not that easy to kill," he said with a nonchalant shrug.

"And so fucking what?! Don't eat underwear food, that is disgusting!"

"Blah blah," he said, making duck mouth gestures. "You nag like my mother. Geez! Women and their commands and care,"

"Don't eat such or else,"

"Or else what? You will nag like Elle always does? I've heard her yell about this all my life so nothing changes,"

"Ace, your h—" he wiped his hands on the thigh of my jumpsuit. He used his insane speed so I couldn't stop him on time. Not that I would have been able to even if I did. My eyes twitched. "Are you that dirty or you're just trying to annoy me?"

He grinned. "Both."

"And ladies throw themselves on a pig like you?"

He snorted like one and winked at me again. "All for the dick—"

"How do they even suck your dirty thing?!"

"Wanna find out?" He asked with a suggestive wiggle of his brows.

"Ew! Gross!"

"I don't know why you see it as dirtiness, I wash my briefs every week,"

"How many times a week?" I asked with a suspicious peer.

"One, why?" Oh my freaking lord! Where did Rielle get this one from? He's an absolute monster!

"Ace!"

"Geez, woman," he groaned, massaging his temples. "It's not like I'm going to die of underwear poisoning—"

"That can happen, you know,"

"Again, vampire," he said mirthlessly.

"Flaming freak, different from vampire, dickhead," I scoffed. Note, I was cursing. I never curse because somehow, I end up in pain. I discreetly looked around, as if to make sure Maribeth and the others wouldn't pop out of nowhere and try to hit me.