No Better Version of Me Than When I'm With You

Chapter 9

Chapter Summary: Aquariums, a weekend spent at Minho's, more house renovation, and a generous heap sprinkling of denial.

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It would've been easy to avoid Newt the next morning, given Newt had slept in the guest room and wasn't showing any signs of leaving; but after a sleepless night in their bed that felt far too big overthinking his actions, Thomas needed to clear the air between them or he worried it would fester. Having woken up at half past six, Thomas decided to go for a run before talking to anyone. The movement and different surroundings helped clear his head, and by the time he got back to shower and make some coffee he felt steadier and more level-headed. He knew he'd be late to work by not leaving right then, but fixing things Newt was more important.

He crept into the darkened guest bedroom once he knew Newt was awake - he'd heard him get up and go to the bathroom before tucking himself back under the blankets - and sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Hey." Thomas said quietly, cringing inwardly at how awkward he sounded. "I uh. . ." He cleared his throat, fiddling with the corner of a blanket. "I just wanted to say sorry again, about last night. I didn't mean to. . .I was just trying to, I dunno, help I guess. But it didn't go right, exactly. . ." Thomas trailed off, chuckling awkwardly and wishing he could disappear into the floor. There was a hollow silence, during which he tried not to let his heart jump out his throat, and wondered vaguely why he was so afraid of Newt's answer.

"It's fine." Came his reply, so quiet he had to lean in to hear him. "I know what you meant by it. Let's just forget it, okay? We're good."

The knot in his stomach loosened with his next exhale. Thomas nodded, even though he knew Newt wasn't looking. Okay. They were fine, nothing had changed between them, and that knowledge was reassuring.

Switching gears, he changed the subject after a few moments. "You should talk to Nick -"

"About that?" Newt's laugh was derisive.

"Fuck no." Thomas gasped out, a giddy laugh escaping him. "About yesterday in general, I mean. He just wants to help, same as me."

"He told me I should go for a walk, Tommy." Newt snarked back, still without lifting his head or rolling over to face him.

"He just wants what's best for you. I get the impression this is kinda new to him, cut him a little slack. And besides, you said you'd go to the aquarium with me this weekend."

"That's different."

"Is it?"

"Yes." Thomas heard a small sigh escape from him. "Because it's you."

Thomas tried not to react at the weight of his words, refusing to read more into it than he should, and tried to reply in a level voice. "Text him. Call him. Something, anything. He's probably worried."

Newt let out a heavier sigh, "I'll text him later - promise."

"Good. Eat something today too, hm? There's leftover spaghetti in the fridge, and coffee in the pot." Thomas suggested.

"Not hungry." Newt replied, voice muffled by the pillow now. He buried further into the bed, clearly ready to stop talking.

Thomas sighed, knowing it was no use fighting. Newt would eat if he felt inclined, but there was nothing he could do to make him if he didn't want to. Before he left for work, he left a glass of water on the bedside table and got a grunt of thanks in response.

He was only mildly distracted that day at work, but it was late when he got home. Deciding against staying up later to watch something or agree to play with Minho and the gang, Thomas changed into his pj's after a quick dinner and found Newt exactly where he'd left him that morning. Instead of moving to his own bed, he slid in next to Newt on the smaller bed in the guest room. Neither of them said anything, but it didn't escape his notice that Newt reached for his hand and laced their fingers together. Thomas ignored the way his stomach flipped over as he did. He was worried that it would be awkward between them after the kiss and after his stumbling apology that morning but it wasn't, and for that he was massively relieved.