Hold On To My Heart // narry au

chapter 11

a/n : so! I changed the title, i changed the summary and I changed everything.

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; harry

"What is this?"

"My son"

"What are you- Harry, are you okay?"

"Just take him, I need to get away for a while!" I thrusted Rian into Liam's arms and Louis looked at me like I was crazy. Maybe I was crazy.

Love can make you crazy, that was true.

"Where's Niall?" Louis asked, looking at me worriedly. Liam was rocking Rian in his arms and I had the sudden urge to cry.

"Niall left" I said, turning away to leave but I already knew whose grip was strong enough to pull me back.

"What do you mean he left, Harry?" Louis asked, standing in front of me. Liam, who still had a grip on me loosened his hold.

"I meant he fled" I said, glaring at Louis who was blocking my way.

"What did you do to make him flee!" Louis shouted.

"I didn't do anything!" I shouted back, eyes blazed with anger.

The room suddenly felt too hot and I needed to get out of here! This wasn't- this wasn't good for me. I needed air and fast.

I moved to leave again when Liam's voice stopped me in my tracks.

"Harry, what's this? It was in Rian's grip"

I turned around and saw Liam's eyebrows furrowed as he read the letter. Shit, Rian had it. How did he even...

"You accepted"

I opened my mouth to fight about it but Liam already was looking at me with that knowing look that shut me up immediately.

"If you didn't accept it, they wouldn't send you a letter to get everything set up there, Harry! What the hell were you thinking!" Liam was the one shouting now and I had my hair in my fingers, gripping it as i paced back and forth.

"I don't know! I don't know okay! I really wanted to go!"

I know it was wrong, I know it was selfish. After what I told Niall, it was really wrong to lie to him.

But my dream was right there, it was so close and all I had to do was accept. I know i couldn't bring Niall and Rian with me but in my mind it was somehow possible.

"This is literally a decision of love or success, Harry" Liam said, his voice softer now.

"Im not sure I've picked yet" I mumbled hopelessly.

"Mate, I think you did" Louis said, shaking his head dissapointedly.

"I haven't! Niall left, not me" I protested.

"Niall left because you chose already, Harry! He's pregnant for god's sake Styles, don't you care at all?" Louis glared at me.

"Of course I care!"

"Really? So why are you here and not searching for him then? Your plan was to drop Rian here and go drink your problems away, am i right or am I right?" Louis challenged.

"You- you're.."

I was at a loss of words, why do people always seem to know me better than I know myself?

"Well that won't do any good because newsflash Styles, you have a child! Who - might I add, is on the brink of crying out for the man who gave birth to him! Now, get your pretty little head straight and go find your fucking husband before I find him another - god knows I will to put him out of the misery you've been putting him through"