[ 𝙰𝚜𝚑𝚎𝚜, 𝙰𝚜𝚑𝚎𝚜 - 𝙺𝚕𝚊𝚞𝚜 𝚡 𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛 ]

♚ 𝖔𝖓𝖊 ♚

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"[Y/N] [L/N] is dead," my mother announces, securing the top button of the dainty white blouse I was wearing, taking a step back to admire her work, seeing what other imperfections she could attempt to fix on her problematic daughter. "and in her place, you."

She grasped me firmly by the shoulders, as if to embrace me, but I knew my mother. Instead, she spun me around, scoffing slightly as she began to pluck hair strands that had stuck to my blouse off and brushed them from her fingers, her long nails almost clawing at my back. I stood stick straight, head held high, trying desperately to not shed a single tear as she spun me back around. She stepped out of the way promptly and stood by my side. 

"Look at you," She said finally, her tone defiant as daughter and mother stared into the intricate mirror propped up against the wall in my bedroom, admiring how I looked proper for once in my life. "It's almost like you are a different person entirely. I should have been stricter with how you dressed from the beginning itself it seems.."

"You remember everything I told you, correct?" She asked me, handing me my messenger bag which she had packed oh so carefully and hung behind my door. "If you don't remember, which I of course, assume you don't, I wrote down everything in here. I always plan ahead like that." She shoved my worn leather journal into my palms, watching me with an almost pitiful stare as I fumbled to put into my bag.

"Yes mother, I remember." I said in a somber tone, hoping to leave the room as soon as possible so I didn't have to deal with anymore of her questions and belittlement of me. "You've told me 3 times in the past 23 minutes."

"I did not ask for any rude remarks," she said sharply, and I shut my mouth as quickly as I had opened it. "And I reminded you since you always forget. If you truly remember, what are you supposed to do the minute you reach Aunt Claire's doorstep?" 

Damn it. I blinked a few times, trying to restart my brain, hoping to remember. "Greet her properly, unpack my things, and help her with anything she needs help with?" 

Silent glaring. 

"Study?" I suggested, my voice barely above a whisper as I wrung my hands secretly behind my back. My mother sighed and grabbed me by the hand, and I flinched slightly, hoping she wouldn't notice how I nearly brought my hands up to my face.

"[Y/N]. I love you, I really do. Since the moment you opened your eyes, I have tried to make your life the most perfect it could possibly be. I ensured you had a good education, made sure you were healthy, I cared for you in every way possible. But the moment I gave you the freedom of doing whatever you pleased and released you from those bonds, you destroyed any chances of stepping into Beauforth and achieving your dream by becoming friends with that wretched girl. Now, you have a second chance, a chance most people never get. Please, please, don't mess this one up. For my sake and yours."

I had to restrain myself from laughing at every word that spilled out of this woman's mouth. Care? For me? She had restricted me from the joy of being a child, from living the few years of my life where nothing mattered, locking me away, forcing me to shove my face into books, and never even allowing me to make friends. The quote-unquote 'bonds' she said she released was letting me go to public school. And of course, the first friend I make, she blames the entire incident on her. It wasn't Charlie's fault. She was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. 

"Fine. I won't. I wasn't planning on doing so anyway. I wasn't born to make your life miserable, and I don't plan to make my life like that either. Can I leave now? Reggie arrives in 4 minutes," I murmur, glancing at my watch. Sure enough, The tiny hands ticking their way around the numbers showed 12:26 PM, and I needed to be outside right now if I wanted to get to our drivers' car and get to Aunt Claire's house on time.  

My mother looked at me with a look I couldn't recognize, which was odd. It wasn't pity, or anger, or regret, like the looks she normally gives me. It was depressing, and she looked hesitant, as if she wanted to say something, but decided against it. Maybe it was I love you, or I really do care about you. I wouldn't know. I never saw her again after that. 

"..Go ahead." She nodded towards the door. I stepped towards it, desperate to leave, when she called my name one more time. I looked over my shoulder, taking her in, her stance, the way she looked as if she would crumble if she held up this facade of a perfect personality any longer, when she said the one thing I was hoping I wouldn't hear.

"Don't fail me." 

I nodded stiffly, turning around, swinging the door shut before almost immediately bursting into silent tears. I sped down the hallway, breaking out into a run, refusing to acknowledge the fact I could almost definitely hear a muffled sob from my old room as I raced down the stairs, wanting to leave this behind. Wanting to leave her  behind. 

I somehow made it out into the courtyard without tripping over my own two feet and burst through the iron gate surrounding the manor I had grew up in and learned to hate. Wiping away my tears, I stood silently in front of the gate, hands clenched into fists at my sides, listening as the still open gate creaked in the wind, the only other sound on the still road being the fallen leaves scraping along the pavement. 

Reggie arrived right on time, and I'm glad he did, or otherwise I might have just curled up into a small ball on the sidewalk and died. He greeted me with a small, sad smile, wearing his gray flat cap as always. I clambered into the sleek car silently, suddenly remembering I wouldn't see him again after today. All those memories of him taking me to sunday school and, very rarely, to the park would be distant memories. Him and his crooked smile would be gone forever.

Refusing to allow myself to cry again, I simply handed him the slip of paper tucked into my journal, which I didn't realize was there until now, with directions to Aunt Claire's house. I dropped it into his palm quickly when I realized it was handwritten by my mother. 

"You okay, kiddo?" Reggie asked softly, his hands gripping the steering wheel. I nodded, silent. He nodded, staring off, past the road in front of him. "You say bye to mum?" 

I stiffened, not sure how to reply. "Yeah," I said finally, my voice breaking. "Can we go now?"

"Course, 'course.." He murmured, starting the car and beginning to roll down the street. I secretly glanced over my shoulder to take one last look at the wretched home I grew up in, and froze. There she stood, in the window, watching me with an emotionless expression. Her makeup was clearly smeared, and she had tried her best to fix it. Just like she had tried her best to fix me. 

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