Falling Flower (A Meanie Fanfic)

1. Don't Wanna Cry

WONWOO'S POV:

It's like one of those nights when you stare at the wall and feel breathless. It's not a panic attack or a sudden surge of tears. You are just there staring at the wall breathless and hopeless, falling deeper into an abyss. It hurts, drives you crazy and you just keep wishing that you were dead with each breath.

I am tired of everything.
And who do I blame for it, everybody and nobody but most of all myself.

When did it all start and when it's going to end? I have no answer to that, besides my symphony of destructive self hatred.

I am the one who chose to be an idol despite knowing what it did to my elder brother. I went against everyone to fulfill my dreams and here I am now filled with overwhelming guilt and regret.

User1234lovestar: He is a bully, I can tell just by looking at his face.

Usernanatr2: He and his friend both are same. Why did I ever Stan them? Shame!!

User324: Why doesn't he die too.

User121: Why don't you fucking follow your friend to the grave.

All the blames and curses circled through my mind like a cyclone.

"Wonwoo, the company will try to solve this issue as soon as possible
..But....I guess for the time being you should apologize to the public and go into hiatus."

"Huh?" I looked up at my manager. Everything filled me with disgust. I nodded and left the suffocating company building.

I thought it would be different, I won't end up like him. But here I find myself in the same building as him.
I look down and I know, no matter what I won't kill myself, no matter how much I want to kill myself, I know I am not like him. This is not the end.

I take a deep breath and step back from the edge of the roof. But......why am I falling down?..... d..id I trip??
Slowly everything is fading away....I can't see anything....I want to live.....Please God..................!

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Note : It's a short one...others will be longer...Please excuse my typos or grammatical mistakes if any...