Moon And Star

chocolate ball

18 October 2022

Night prep.
No actually.
It's about the whole day.

Star,
He gave a girl chocolate.
Which is handmade.
By him.

I never felt anything like this.
The most silent pain.
Thorn from inside of my heart.
The bleed which cause by someone I close with.

I could just forget about it.
Like I always do.
But I can't in this case.
I don't know why.
The jealousness it hold
Everything is too much.

I used to just talked to my friend about random things.
Just to forget about the things that break my heart.
But I can't.
I just hold my tears from falling down.
That's all I can do.
Zahra say that my face is expressionless.
That time, all I want to do is hug her and cry out loud and let everything out.
But I couldn't.
I can't cry.

During my way walking back hostel
My eyes let two drops tears I couldn't hold.
That time I realized.
It's too much.
I love him too much.
Way too much.

After light off,
Nurul joking with her roommates.
I walk pass by and she call my name.
I couldn't talk or say anything since I still shocked so I just nodded and went to toilet.
I want to say sorry to her tho.

Today is a good day, until she talk about that handmade chocolate star gave her.

Cause deep in my heart,
There's cut that is bleed.