❛. 𝑪𝑹𝑼𝑺𝑯⸻ ᴀᴀʟɪʏᴀʜ . ❜

≡;- ꒰𝙍𝘼𝙂𝙄𝙉𝙂 𝙄𝙉𝙎𝙄𝘿𝙀°꒱

No song

Not edited

"This is Aaliyah, can't pick up the phone right, so leave a message ight?" Her warm voice filled my ears making me frown, well her voicemail, in fact, was not the real her, just a stupid-ass pre-recorded that I didn't ask for. Weeks have gone by and there was no sight of her, not a hey, not a note, not a message, nothing. It was like she excluded, so far to it and it made me upset. Was she mad at me? Of course, she was, if friends slept together and somehow left things off on a weird note, avoiding that person would be the right thing to do, I figure that Aaliyah herself might have processed her thoughts and didn't want to deal with me. Surely it upset me even more.

I left her sad voicemails, angry ones, and apologetic ones, I left that girl any voicemail that I could just in order to get her attention but nothing came about. Like myself and how I was I didn't let it slide to me, the more I sent them the more she kept receiving, it got so intense for me that I ended up having a nothing breakdown, a breakdown out of guilt and deception all because I had figured that I fucked up so badly. I was glad had this breakdown with no one around, in one of the days when my family trusted me on living alone in my house, having no fear anymore in their mind I would do something crazy, they had trust and me but I took that in vein, I was not genuine when it came to what they wanted in me. Not at all.

I had missed calls myself, missed calls from dad which I ignored, and missed calls from my mother. It was simple to say I was still struggling, struggling with my entry of demons and who I thought I had around me, Elgin, sure maybe, maybe I still had him around, I mean through the weeks I was home alone he would check on me the most, unlike the rest I could tell he was no trusting in me. He had his doubts that I would slowly have a downfall dealing with me being so alone, he knew that and stuck around. Even when he was dating on the side, giving me doubts that we would never connect again, he was still there for me, even when he was on my shit list for it, he was still there for me. On a friend level, I guess. He was there for me when I had a breakdown with the voicemail, that day when I lost it all because Aaliyah wasn't talking to me, and that day when I felt so alone. He was the one there, he came over and he gave me advice he told me everything I needed to hear but yet I was still in dispute over my feelings.

"I'm so close Elgin," I moaned in his ear as I pinned him on my couch. Let's just say my calling him over the way I did was a in zone, when I mean in zone, is when you get someone to comfort you and you really use them as an advance of your own suffering, that's what I was doing, I was using him to help me with the pain I was inflicting myself with aliyah. Surely I didn't care, He seemed to gain in when he knew that I was desperate for him. He was seeing someone but guess she wasn't someone while I was pleasuring him at this moment.

Elgin gripped my waist as he guided up more against me, Our foreheads were connected as we were panting to one another, and his moans were like music to my ears a turn for me as a woman to be exact, I loved when men were vocal during sex it made it so normal to me, other guys that I have been with before Elgin wasn't like this, they weren't so sexual advances, He wasn't scared when it came to sex when it came to making me feel every exotic orgasm that he fulfilled just so I could be satisfied, he never minded doing the other stuff, if we were both comfortable, it was just how it was. A pure sex drive between us.