The Other Girl

Part 8

Jade's POV

Last night at the hospital I didn't have time for games anymore, so I just came out and said it. I told Beck I liked someone else. I didn't tell him who, and tried to be as gentle as I could. Suprisingly enough, he said he already knew. Man, I was more obvious than I thought. What was weird though is he said he'd known for about a year now. He told me I was growing more and more distant, and he was just waiting for me to figure it out for myself. He hoped I would change my mind, because he loved me so much. But in the end, especially the last month or two, he knew there was no saving us.

I was angry with him, almost furious. How could he just drag me along like that? Then again...wasn't I doing it too? I think we both were, but we just didn't realize that. Thinking back on it, he had become a lot more..like a best friend rather than a boyfriend. He'd stopped being sexual with me for a month and I didn't even notice. I had been opening up to him far more than I was in the first year and a half of us dating, which was a sign in itself. We were meant to be close. Just not in the way we had tried to be.

I knew this would hurt like a bitch for both of us for awhile, so he told me he needed some space. Which I respected, I could probably use some too. We had a long talk, asking eachother about the last couple months. I didn't tell him who I liked, though I was sure I didn't have to. The last thing he told me before we went out to the car, it's all I can hear right now.

"I know you want to deny your feelings, force yourself to believe you belong with me. But please Jade." He had taken my hands, looking deep into my eyes. It made me soft and vulnerable, he knew that. "Please just..let yourself be. Stop fighting it. You know I just want you happy, I like to see you in your truest sense of self. Do that for me." All I could do was nod, but I hoped my expression told him more than my mouth could. It was an emotional couple of hours, and I'm sure I'll cry about it for a good while. But it needed to happen, and I know we'll both be okay.

Now I sit here, on Tori Vega's bed. Her room oozed her personality in every single way, and from the first time I was there I was intrigued. Well, now that I was here alone, I was going to take advantage of that. Expecting to find a massive amount of photos of her family and friends, I only found four that were framed. One was of her family when she was a bit younger, back in her home state I presumed. Another of her and her sister playing in a completely different house, that one made me smile a bit. The third was our friend group, a fairly recent photo actually. I remembered when Andre had asked the stranger to take it for us.

The final one shocked me the most, it was me and her. Back when I had my brown hair, my eyebrow wasn't even pierced yet. She had her arm around me, and I was throwing up a piece sign. Beck had taken that one, funnily enough. Now that I thought about it, I think my feelings for her had started to develop around that time. That particular evening Beck and I weren't on the best of terms, so I essentially hung around her the entire evening. We talked about stupid stuff, basically complaining about people and how bleak the world can be. I was suprised at how easily she could talk about it. Miss sunshine and rainbows wasn't so pure after all.

"Seeing anything interesting?" I whipped around, still holding the photo of us in my hand.

"I..sorry. I was just looking around." There was no point in lying, she could see what I was doing. Who knows how long she'd been standing there watching me smile? The thought of it was incredibly embarrassing. "Is that for me?" My hand gestured to a plate she held containing a pretty good looking breakfast.

"Indeed is, you want it? If not I can save it for later." I shook my head, realizing how hungry I was.

"No I'd like it now...thanks, Vega." Almost begrudgingly, she produced a small smile. I could see at that moment how tired her face looked. Not even just physically, she seemed spiritually and emotionally exhausted too. Knowing that was my fault, I felt guilt eating at me once again. Like a small bug that latches onto your ribs and refuses to let go until you give out. We sat on the edge of her bed, eating in silence. I wanted to hold her and tell her everything would be okay, but my stupid nerves wouldn't let me. Even after all this, I still felt a barrier preventing me from doing what I wanted to do.