His Wounded Heart Beats For One (Levi x Reader Fanfiction)

23: Retreat

You and Levi reenter the grasslands, neither able to speak up. He sighs as he wanders through the bustling farmland, his thumb anxiously rubbing the sheaths of his ODM gear. 

"Are you okay, Levi?" you ask. 

"I'm fine." He looks back at the manor, eyeing the soldiers standing guard on its roof and imagining the activity within. Activity continues around him, but his mind seems to have decelerated amongst the swarm. He silently asks the world to slow down, to allow him to catch up, but it doesn't listen. 

You see the way his brow furrows and how his fingertips barely twitches as they grip his gear. It's so subtle, but it's there.

"Levi," you say softly. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." He exhales as if it could force the weight off his chest. "It's just...damn noisy. That's all."

You know it's an excuse, but you've already thought of a way to alleviate both his excuse and his overwhelmed irritation. "Let me show you something." 

He side-eyes you. "What?"

"Come on." You take a few steps away from him, urging him along. 

He eventually follows once you're too far from him, almost like a child anxious to return to his mother. You take him to the cellar door, which has been left splayed open. He scans the entrance, curious but confused. "Here," you say as you descend into the cellar. "It stinks, I know, but it's private. It's quieter down here."

He treads into the cellar silently, his toes barely making contact with each step beneath him. He puts a fist just under his nose as he enters, stifling a cough in the musty air. "How'd you know this was here?" 

"The Scouts discovered it earlier today. I investigated it with Erwin."

He drifts to and swipes a few fingers over one of the dilapidated barrels and physically recoils from how much dust it leaves on his fingertips. "Hmph. Did you bond with that jackass or some shit?"

"No. We...um, we actually argued." 

"Argued?" He knocks a fist into the support post, mildly startled when it actually creaks against his light punch. "What about?"

"Um, you—well, me. Us. I don't know. Attachment. That sort of...shit."

"Tch." He eyes the roof above him, ensuring his little inspection didn't prompt a collapse. "The sort of shit he knows nothing about. Typical."

You find the sauerkraut Hange pointed out earlier, and you mindlessly stare at the icky sludge. "I don't think he knows nothing," you say softly. "I just think he's...put his attention elsewhere. He doesn't try to get close to anyone." 

"I can't say I admire it." Levi wanders through the space, examining the jars you had already investigated. 

"It wouldn't work for me, no." You debate leaning against the shelves, but decide against it. "But it must for him."

"Is that so?" He stops a meter from you, crossing his arms so gently he might as well be tenderly hugging himself. "Do you take solace in having someone to rely on?"

You eye his half-lit frame, intrigued by his question. "I do, yeah."

"Like...hm, like me?"

Your heart leaps, and heat rises in your chest as you bask in his simple question. "I—yes. Of course. I always appreciate your reliability." A vague realization strikes you, and you want to immediately change your answer. "You," you utter. "I appreciate you. I...really do."

He fights to hide his reaction, showing nothing more than a short exhale and a tighter grip on his own arms. "That's...good." His eyes drop to the floor, then eventually climb back up your body. "I must, too, I think."