The path Of New world

Thirty

Life is not hard but the situations we live in make it hard. We never forget someone. But we learn to live without them. Like that, the wounds may heal, but it will leave a mark there. We learn to live with it, without being affected much. Our surroundings and people made it little less painful. Untill then, it will hurt. We just have to endure it.

"Y/n eat little." Your mother lift spoon near your mouth. You didn't open it or look at her. You blankly watching wall front of you. Nothing interesting there. Your mother sighed.

You woke up a hour after they changed you in OP ward. Soon you wake up, you searched for your cub. But all you received was a news of your cub's death. Your mother stayed your side. Namjoon and yoongi took care of baby's funeral and other details. Jin went outrage, so taehyung and Jungkook took him to home. Hoseok stayed in hospital with him jimin too. They did everything your mother asked for. Atleast one stayed by your side all the time.

You didn't cry till you heared news. You blanked out, you stared at wall or ceiling. You don't hear anything, you see anyone. It's just you and your world. You don't even know what you're thinking, what you are seeing, what you are hearing. For you, time stopped. Everything around you stopped.

Hoseok stayed your side. Jimin went to attend a call. Your mother went to your home to take care of something. Hoseok watched you, you staring ceiling. You look fragile and weak. He felt guilt, it's all his fault.

Hoseok walked near you. He gulped. It may or may not right time to approach you. But he still want comfort you. He is Hurting because you hurt. Hoseok sat beside you. He laid beside you then hugged you. You felt something bring back you to reality. You looked at his face. He closed his eyes, afraid you will push him away. You said nothing, but cried.  Jimin walked in, he saw your crying figure in hoseok's arm. He gave space and walked away.

We afraid to get hurt, at the same time we hate our loved one hurt too. To avoid them being hurt, we get hurt. For you, you Afrid to get hurt, to avoid it. You hurt yourself more. You missed them, still afraid to get hurt. The fear of physical hurt, pushed you in mental hurt.

Everyday, you remembered the day you spend happiest movement with them. But end of it, you also remembered bad memories too. You stopped yourself. Watching your mother struggles to avoid neighbours harsh words, and insults. You hide yourself from them. Protect your cub, but your cub died. You stayed there, because you had your child. You want to give birth, watch it grow well and run around you. But you're not that luckiest.

You got discharged in a week, they warned you to be careful. After you cried hard untill you fall asleep, you felt little better. Hoseok stayed more your side, the bad days was unspoken between you two. No one dared to bring that back.

Namjoon and yoongi, showed sometimes,  Because it was neonatal death hospital took care of it burial. They two mostly did paper works about it. Taehyung and Jungkook after some time. Jin never showed himself, it understandable why he didn't came. They explained he went outrage, so they locked him in his room. They gave sleeping pills to him. It will take same time. They asked you to came back to them or stay for while. But you refused. You went back to your mother's.

"Before you, I had a child. He died in his birth too. My mother said same issues. And her mother said same to her. I think it's our family's curse. My sweet y/n. Don't be stressed, flower went to good place" you mother said, while she folding cloths in your room. You nodded. You gave a nick name to your cub, it's flower.

"Atleast I should have be more careful" You teared again.

"It's not your fault, no one know what will happen next." you mother cupped your face and kissed your fore head. You felt like you will cry, but blinked it to control. She hugged you, soon she noticed your struggle she patted your back to indicate it's okey to cry.

"I want to see him" you said. You mother looked at your eyes for minute. She understand who you want meet. She smiled and nodded.

"I will call yoongi to pick you up." She realised hug and take her mobile and dialed.

"How did you get contact of him?" You asked her. She looked you from mobile. She smiled.

"From the day you moved here back" she walked out to talk in mobile. You assumed, she may got contact when he dropped your things here. They seem close to eachother. You noted mentally to ask about it later. You start to fold remaining clothes, that your mother leave behind.

After a minute or two your mother come back in. "He said he will pick you up in hour. Go get shower and dress up." She lift you by your hand. She suddenly become teen again. You looked at her confused, still you took a  casual outfit. "And y/n" your mother called you, you turn back and looked at her. "What you think about yoongi?" She asked you. You widen your eyes, and blushed. What is she implying?.

"He.. what about him? He is a good friend" you said. Your mother noticed your blush. She smirked. She playfully hit you in shoulder. And walked out. You confused what your mother thinks in her head?.

About yoongi. Yoongi was stone person, only become flower to someone he love. You sometime noticed, your mother laughes with her texts or call. You never asked, because she is laughing that was all you needed at that time. But you never guessed it was one of the boys. Even if you guessed, you would never think it was yoongi. Yoongi was nice to you, but never closed his distance between you. He like to tease you, cruse you or ignore you. You just felt happy with his presence, so you never asked for his words or skinships. He was your silent comforter.

You noticed that yoongi spending his time with your mother rather than you. He let Hoseok stay with you, but he never leaved hospital. he just kept his distance. Thinking about that now, made your heart clinch at the same time beat faster too. It was painful but still find you happy in it. You want to throw yourself under big truck or train. How can you like this?

You never belived love. You always thought about it was kind of attraction on a person that will keep for life time. But when you fall in love with not one but seven. You realised love was something, you never can control like some mare attraction. But it was painful to keep it. You can feel your feelings getting higher and higher everytime you think about them. Their memories make you fall for them, how can you control your feelings. You found it better if you leave them alone. But it's wrong, more you try to ignore it, more you fall.