When Love Lasts.

IXX

We flop on the couch.
"Some sweet home" I say.

"Tell me about it" Akbar adds.
"That was eventful and eye opening, honestly I don't think I'll ever trust her to be there without a guardian"

"She has your brother and he seems really intense, very tense"
I nod "Yeah, too intense sometimes. At times it feels like he's older"

He smiles "It's because you're his sisters, it's his duty to protect you but until he gets back I've taken that role upon myself. He has nothing to worry about"

I need to ask, is he doing and saying these things intentionally? Because it would make zero sense that he doesn't know how it affects me.

I huff.
"You good?"
"I'm not really sure".

"They'll be fine"
"It's not about them, I know I don't need to worry as long as Nura knows about it"

He sits up worriedly "So? What's the frown for? Did something happen that I'm not aware of?"I shake my head.

"There's nothing, I'm just—I'm confused"
"Why?"

"You Akbar, you're making me confused and it feels like I'm going crazy, honestly. All this and you don't have feelings for me? Am I supposed to believe that? I don't "

"I know but Safina—"
"—Yeah I know, you're married" I stand "I'm going to go get some rest, hopefully I'll start feeling better and ready for work tomorrow".

::

Nadia's mouth drops.
"Are you sure someone isn't threatening him to stay away from you?"

I roll my eyes.
"No but seriously that makes more sense than not having feelings for you. The man took a break from work, you said there's nothing he loves more than work and yet he actually took a break to be there for you"

I nod.
"You can imagine my dilemma. It makes me feel—worse. He told me clearly that he doesn't love me and there he was by my side when I needed him"

She just keeps looking at me, pitifully.
"What if that's what he wants? For you to depend on him? For you to be weak for him?"

"No, he's not like that"
"But you're not sure"

I fold my arms "And what does he have to gain from it? What? There are better, single and wealthy women out there who would do anything to have someone like him, why me? It makes no sense"

"Maybe because you were desperate"
I shake my head "That's not the case"

She tilts her head "How are you so sure?"
"Because I know, I can feel it Nadia. The worst part is that—he says he loves her but I don't feel it. To me he feels like a man yearning for love"

She huffs "Do you think they might be having problems? Because it's possible that's the case, maybe that's why it feels like he's yearning for you"

"I didn't say for me but for love"
She huffs "Talk to him. Ask him why he played all those games with you, ask him to be straightforward and when he insists on being married and uninterested you move on"

I nod "What other choice do I have? He said he'd help me with a place, we're going to go check it out tomorrow"

She nods "Now, tell me about Noor"
"Hmm"

"Spit it out, what happened?"
"I told you, she was dating this older guy and I had to separate them before he ruins my sister"

Yes.
I kept it from her.
But I feel it's better to keep it within family, she's close to me but not everyone needs to know our business.

"Wow, and she really loves him?"
I shrug "Apparently, she does but I doubt he had the intentions of putting a ring on it"

"Ah, it's better that you cut it off"
"I know".

::

"So? Do you like it?" I ask Akbar.
We finally got home after a whole day of surfing houses. He complains for one reason or the other.

Yeah it seems to bother him more.
"I liked the 9th one"
I stare at him.
"What?"

"Because it's a walking distance from your mom's place?"
He shrugs "Yes, that way I can be more comfortable, the neighborhood is safe and gated"

I huff.
What I wanted was to keep a safe distance not move right next to their mother.

"I'm not sure"
"Why? Is there a particular reason you don't want to. You liked it so much at least until I mentioned my mother's place"

I sigh "Because it's still close"
"That bothers you"

I nod "The plan is to—keep a safe distance"
"Why?" He asks looking hurt.

"Because I'm tired of being played"
"You think I'm playing you?"

"You are, you're just not admitting it but you are and you know it".
He just stares at me, like I was going crazy.

"Don't look at me that way, you know it's true"

He huffs "I remember the first time I saw you. You were seated by in a corner in the cafeteria, you looked tired, sad and miserable. I tried to look away, it wasn't my place to ask or try to help but I couldn't. Something about seeing you that way kept bothering me and I felt terrible that I couldn't do anything about it. Why should a young and beautiful girl sit in a corner looking like she has given up on life. I was hesitant because I've seen how people's kindness was used against them and then I met you. Things were difficult but you smiled and you never let it weigh you down so I decided to help the best way I could. After a while it didn't feel like I was helping, it felt more like a duty, an obligation and I liked it. I liked that from the time I knew you, you got brighter and happier and I was glad to see you that way, the way you should look. So I tried my very best to make you smile, be there for you so you wouldn't have to depend on insolent men like your Uncle. I got you familiar with my family because I knew they'd accept you." He takes a deep breath.

"Safina you weren't just a stranger anymore, you were like a sister. Not to me alone but to Abdul as well. After your incident with Hanifa I tried keeping a safe distance, because she told me you had feelings but eventually it stopped making sense to me, I asked myself why you'd have feelings for me. It didn't make sense because you obviously weren't attracted to me. Then that thing with Saratu happened and it made me feel terrible that I got you involved with her so I wanted you far away from her. You and Abdul were doing your thing and I thought, he needed it and it seemed like you enjoyed the fun although I did get angry about how your plan went downhill. Afterwards I was glad everything was back to normal and everyone was happy. I left for Abuja and put everything on hold, not because I have something to gain or I have feelings for you but because you've become someone dear to me, like a sister" he huffs "I'm sorry if everything I've done might have led you to think that I had romantic intentions, if I had known I would have changed my tactic completely but I don't regret what I did and I'm glad I did it, I'd do it all over again but I understand why you'd want to keep a safe distance and I apologize if you feel like I've been trying to control your life so I won't anymore. But no matter what I do or how much I try, I'll never love you, at least not the way you want me to. I'm married and love my wife so much and if that's a problem for you then I guess it's better you keep that safe distance".

He walks out.

::
Last chapter coming up.