Louis Tomlinson. Louis_Tommo_: Anyone want to come to couples therapy with me to see how long it takes for the therapist to realize we don't know each other?
❤️ 🔁 [8th November 2022, 3:45am] [Twitter for Samsung]
[120 likes] [19 retweets] [12 quote tweets]
[3 replies]
Harry_Styless: I'm in Doncaster, you up for it?
Louis_Tommo_: McDonald's, in twenty minutes? I'll buy you a big mac.
Harry_Styless: Make it nuggets and you have yourself a deal
---
It's 2:02, and a guy just sat opposite him. "Louis Tomlinson?" He says.
"Yeah. Harry Styles?" He replies. The man nods, and Louis slides the nuggets over to him.
"Cheers." He says. "Now, are we actually doing this or did I get up at the ass crack of dawn for nothing?"
"Well, we could do it. I found this place near-by that has an appointment available for 12 o'clock." Louis says, turning his laptop for the other to see.
"Cool." He says. "Should we make a story up or just improvise?"
"We should know a few basic facts about each other, but we can make up shit and improvise. It'll be more fun." Louis muses, and Harry barks out a laugh.
"Well, my full name is Harry Edward Styles, and my birthday is the 1st of February, 1994. I'm an artist, so, you know, a waiter." Harry says. "Hence needing you to buy these nuggets, I'm broke."
Louis chuckles. "No problem, well. My full name is Louis William Tomlinson, 24th of December 1991, and I run a sex shop. Yeah. Really."
Harry starts cackling. "I've been there! The G Spot, yeah?" Louis nods. "So you're the bloody genuis that named it?"
"Yeah, it was between that, Jizztopher Nolan, and eGay. I was gonna name it Toys R'N' Us, but I told kids might think it was the other kind of toy shop." Louis says.
Harry starts snort-laughing, and chokes on his nugget.
***
"Louis Tomlinson and Harry Styles?" The therapist says, and they stand, following her into the room. Once they are seated, she turns to them, opening her notebook. She introduces herself as Judy, and they greet her. "Now, what seems to be the problem?"
"Well! This idiot over here keeps coming home late and picking silly arguements with me! And its just got to the point where I can't take it!" Harry begins, and Louis bites back a chuckle.
"What kind of arguments?" She asks.
"Well, he insi- shut up, Louis." Judy scribbles something down in her notebook."He insists on constantly coming home and asking questions, ridiculous ones at that. Just the other day he asked me if I thought that snails ever fought for a mate to prove dominance! How the hell would I know?! I know he works all day in that damn sex shop, and then comes home and asks me questions like that! He can't get sex out of his mind, yet he's always too fucking tired to have sex with me."
Louis' got to hand it to Harry, he's hilarious. How he managed to think of that on the spot is remarkable. The story's weirdly believable.
"Louis? Is there a reason for this?" Judy asks.
"Well, it's because he always gets mad at me for the questions, but I just enjoy asking him these stupid things. There's nothing wrong with it! But he gets mad and tells me I'm madder than his great aunt Doris! So of course I'm going to deny him!"
Harry splutters laughing, but quickly turns it into a hacking cough. "Sorry-"
"It's quite alright, Mr. Styles. Now, care to tell me how you two met?"
YOU ARE READING
Couple's Therapy
FanfictionI saw a Pinterest screenshot of a post saying 'anybody want to go to couples therapy with me and see how long it takes the therapist to realize we don't know each other', and then the reply was 'idiots to lovers #fanfiction' and I was like "hm. Mayb...
