Couple's Therapy

THREE

Judy is now fuming. "Is this supposed to be a joke to you two?"

"Well, in my defense, it was Louis' idea!" Harry exclaims.

"You're the one that replied!" Louis protests.

"Replied?" Judy asks.

"Well... Louis tweeted at four o'clock this morning saying that he wanted to go to couples therapy with someone and see how long it took for the therapist to realize that we weren't a real couple and had just met and... I may of replied? Then we went to McDonald's and Louis bought me nuggets and we kind of just went home and met up here?And I know that it was a very stupid idea-"

"Get out. Get out right now. How dare you come and waste my time, when I could be seeing actual clients." Judy says quietly. "You're paying for this, and if you don't leave I'm calling security. Pull something like this again and we're phoning the police."

Louis chuckles nervously, following Harry out to the reception. He pays, Harry standing by, having already payed Louis with as much as he had.

Then, after being told off again by Judy, they sprinted.

***

"I can't believe I just went to couples therapy with a stranger." Louis laughs. They're sitting on the counter of Louis' shop, it was close by so he just decided to come in here.

"Well, we're not strangers now, not after we tried to salvage our failing relationship." Harry says, he's playing with a pair of fluffy handcuffs that were left on the counter.

"Serious question. Do snails fight to prove dominance?" Louis asks randomly, and Harry wheezes.

"Maybe? It'd be a very slow fight." He muses. "Like a superhero movie that has slow motion scenes, except that it's entirely slow motion. It'd be interesting to watch." He's twirling the handcuffs around, hitting himself in the face more than once.

"Hey, you're buying those." Louis says. 

"Sold. Unfortunately, I have nobody to use them with." Harry says, a little smirk on his face.

"We'll see about that." Louis mutters, and he throws the other over his shoulder, carrying him upstairs. Harry shrieks and giggles.

"Ooooh, you have a nice ass." He remarks, and Louis snorts.

"Yeah, and yours is incredibly flat." Louis responds, slapping the (genuinely flat) flesh.

"Heyyyyyyy." Harry whines. He kicks his legs childishly, almost throwing them both down the stairs with the momentum.

Louis throws him on the bed with a soft thump, and crowds his space, kissing him roughly.

"Wanna know something crazy?" He whispers, and Harry perks up. "I actually have an ex named Jonathan."

Harry giggles. "You tell me about your ex when we're making out? Maybe you are still caught up on him." He teases, already unbuttoning Louis' shirt.

"Maybe so." Louis shrugs, and Harry grabs his face, kissing him.

"I know that we only met a short while ago, and you literally bought me McDonald's at 4am, but I really really like you. Is that crazy?"

"No, what's crazy is going to couples therapy as strangers is crazy, not this." Louis says sincerely. "And, hey. If it's crazy, then we're crazy together."

Harry chuckles. "Like my great aunt Doris."

"Exactly." Louis says, and pushes Harry into the bed.