I Hate You ||2DOC STUDOC AU||

was I even loved

Flashback timeeeeeeee |6y

Murdocs pov

I woke up with a hangover and some nameless bird next to me.  What happened last night I ask myself. I had to leave before she woke up and realized the mistake we drunkenly made last night.

When I got to school I saw him, that little worm was talking to his little friend about some girl he had been seeing or something.
He seemed upset. Poor thing I thought for a second before realizing what it was I had been thinking.

Everyone was talking about it, stus girlfriends been messing around on him. Pathetic I thought.

     I was in my car when I saw Stu walking by himself to his house, I thought about getting out and messing with him but something deep down in the darkest pit of my hateful soul I felt something, sympathy.

After giving myself more options I finally decided....

M: OI FACEACHE GET IN!

His face went pale as he looked back and saw my beat up crozier. I knew he was afraid of me but in being afraid I knew he'd be too scared to decline my offering of a ride. So with that he nodded and slowly got in.

The drive was fairly quiet, every once in a while there'd be a click or a bump but other than that he was just quite. It occurred to me that he didn't really talk, he never talked. Infact he only said two words to me "thank you"

S: murdoc... can I ask you something?

M: hm

S: why did you pick me up

M: don't worry about it okay

S:please just tell me why,  why after a year of treating me like trash you now decide  to be nice to me.

M: because stu I- I feel bad, I was you at one point okay.

S: why, what could you murdoc Niclas "feel bad" about

      He was right... why did I feel bad... what's wrong with me I thought

M: I felt bad because... because of you and Pa-

S: Paula, it's fine. Honestly she made me question a lot of things about myself, she made me ask myself if I was even loved? But you know what. I don't need her to make me feel better

And from there we got silent, the last thing he said to me that evening was a quiet thank you and a small wave. Why did I tell him all that I thought, what was wrong with me , did I really feel bad for him- no I hate him he's not worth feeling bad for, he has everything, he doesn't get to be upset he's Lucky he's nothing like me. He'll never be anything like me~

     2ds pov

What was he on about, why was he being nice to me, did he really  feel bad for me? What was going on...

    I was trying to not let him see how I really felt about
  what Paula had done to me but in all honesty, she hurt me. I really loved her and... I thought she loved me, i thought I ment something to her.

When I found out she had been screwing around with other guys I was in pieces and you know what she told me....

" you where only a distraction for when I got bored.... I never loved you stu, you meant nothing to me"

She's been telling everyone about how she only wanted me for sex and nothing else.... I hate her.... but for some reason, I still love her.

An: OK here it is hope you liked it ♥︎