One More Step (Would It Make Me Free?)

Healing

Therapy was better than expected.

It scared the absolute shit out of Hitoshi at first, of course. But he'd agreed to give it a shot, so he couldn't exactly back out. He pushed through and tried to ignore the shaking of his hands.

Yamaha's presence made it easier. His being there alone made Hitoshi feel better. He didn't stop at just being with him, though. He was subtle about it, but he gave Hitoshi reassurances whenever he needed it - he wasn't quite sure how the man could tell when he did, but he was grateful for it. A hand on his shoulder here, a hand squeeze there, little things such as that kept Hitoshi in the present.

The therapist was actually fairly nice, too. She was a kind older woman who seemed to genuinely care about Hitoshi's problems despite having only just met him. She was nothing at all like Overhaul or his lackeys. As the sessions went on, Hitoshi found himself relaxing more and more in her presence. He didn't think he was ready to be alone with her just yet, but he was sure he could be almost completely calm with her as long as Yamada or Aizawa was with him.

Most of the session was her getting to know him. When he had relaxed enough, though, she began getting a bit deeper. Nothing too difficult yet, but she wanted to know what he struggled with.

He told her only a little, just what he was comfortable with at that time. But he finally had a name to put to some of his experiences. "It sounds like you're experiencing dissociation and flashbacks," she'd told him. She then taught him some grounding techniques that were supposed to help him when those things happened. He hoped they'd actually work. They probably would, right? She seemed to know what she was talking about.

Maybe therapy really was going to help him.

Hitoshi's mental health was being taken care of now, even if progress felt impossibly slow, but there was still another glaring issue. His education.

Hitoshi had never been to school before, being too young to attend when he was kidnapped. He hadn't interacted with anyone his age yet, but he knew he'd be far behind his peers. He wanted to fix that. He wanted to learn.

He said as much to his foster parents. Being teachers, they of course understood, and seemed happy he was at a point he felt ready to go to school. "Besides," Yamada had said. "I'm sure you'd like the chance to make friends your own age!" He was right, of course, but Hitoshi wasn't sure he knew how to make friends. Having the opportunity would be nice, though.

The problem with enrolling him in school was how far behind his peers he was. He couldn't just be enrolled in a high school when he'd never even set foot in an elementary school. His education was going to be much harder to deal with than Eri's, who could just be immediately enrolled.

Tutoring would be necessary, they'd decided, but with his foster parents working five jobs between them, they didn't have the time to ensure he was getting the education he needed. They decided to bring the issue to their boss, to see if there were any teachers at the school who'd have the time to tutor him.

Hitoshi really wished they'd told him beforehand their boss was some sort of rodent. He nearly jumped out of his skin when the principal began speaking.

He shifted uncomfortably under Nedzu's calculating gaze as his foster parents discussed his predicament with him. He wasn't good with facial expressions as it was, but he didn't have the slightest clue what was going through the principal's mind as he stared at him. Is it too late to change my mind? Maybe I don't need an education after all.

Nedzu interrupted whatever Aizawa had been saying - Hitoshi wasn't sure what, too distracted by the rodent to pay attention - a grin spreading across his face. Hitoshi did not trust that grin at all. "Why don't I teach him?" he offered.

Aizawa and Yamada shared a look, before turning to Hitoshi. "Would that be okay with you, Listener?" Yamada asked. No, he wanted to say. This guy's way too unnerving. No way am I gonna be alone with him for hours every day! But Hitoshi simply nodded instead. As strange as he was, he knew the UA principal was highly intelligent. He'd benefit a lot from studying under him, he was sure. He could put up with his strangeness for the sake of his education.

Nedzu's grin grew impossibly wider, and Hitoshi wondered if he wasn't making a mistake.

He began his lessons that Monday.

He didn't need to know what his peers were learning to know how humiliatingly far behind he was. He had to learn literally everything from the ground up; he hadn't had almost a decade of school behind him like most kids his age did. He could feel his cheeks heat up in shame more and more with every lesson he did.

Like the math lessons, where he was learning only the basic four operations. Or Japanese, where he couldn't read more than a couple kanji; far too few for someone his age to know. Hell, it had been so long since he'd last held a pencil that he was struggling to even write hiragana. Hitoshi wasn't sure how Nedzu was planning on getting him enrolled in actual school by the next school year if he was struggling with things like this.

He still wasn't sure what to make of Nedzu. He was always staring at him with that same calculating gaze, occasionally giving a feral grin at some of Hitoshi's responses that he wasn't sure how to interpret.

He was also insistent on teaching him how to play chess. "Strategy's important, and what better to learn it with than chess?" he'd explained cheerily when Hitoshi questioned the purpose of teaching him the game. Personally, he thought actually catching him up to his peers was far more important than a game, but he kept that thought to himself. There had to be a reason behind it, right? He decided to simply continue discussions with Nedzu over games of chess in between his lessons rather than question him.

So yeah, Hitoshi didn't get Nedzu at all. He never made any more sense to him no matter how many lessons he attended. At least he felt less nervous around the principal now, after a couple weeks studying under him, though he knew better than to underestimate the man.

He walked out of the principal's office after his lesson for the day finished. He usually waited by his foster parents' car until they were able to meet him out there. He was still too anxious to hang around in the building itself and risk a student talking to him. He still had no clue how to interact with someone his age.

Today, however, he didn't get to avoid that. He turned a corner sharply at the same time another student did, sending them both to the ground. He rubbed at his head where it'd been hit, looking up at the student, a pink-haired girl with golden eyes. He opened his mouth to apologize, but paused before he could get a single word out. No way. Is that...? She did not share his hesitation.

"Hitoshi?"