Coming to Terms ✔️

13: Show, Don't Tell

Xavier was presumably finishing the project with what footage we had.

I know it wasn't what he wanted since he still had multiple points that he wanted to go over before we stopped filming. He hadn't spoken to me in three days, so I just stopped caring.

My fingers itched to text him. I wanted to check on him so bad. The look on his face before he left haunted me. The feeling of his lips on mine was like a new drug, I couldn't stop thinking about it and desperately wanted more.

Unfortunately, pettiness ran in my blood, so I'd wait for him to make the first play here.

Georgia was right about everything she said. I just couldn't bring myself to dump Charlie if this thing with Xavier was over and done with. What was the point? I was literally pining after a guy who got angry with me for kissing him back.

So I hung out with Charlie every day after our kiss. I even begged him to call out of work for a day or two to stay. I had to get him off my mind, off my heart. I hoped Charlie couldn't tell that something wasn't the same; I wasn't fully in it anymore.

We were out at dinner. I picked at my chicken parm while Charlie spoke animatedly about some guy that came into his job and caused a scene over stamps. "I was ready to hit him but my boss told him to leave," he chuckled, taking a sip of his wine.

"You should have," I fake laughed.

"So what's new with you?" he asked.

Oh, you know, I cheated on you with the guy who's supposed to hate me. "I think I'm done with Xavier's project," I said, but his name felt like sandpaper on my tongue. "So I have a lot of free time."

He grinned at me from across the table, then reached over and grabbed my hand. "Finally," Charlie sighed contently. "I was waiting to tell you that I really don't like that guy."

I wanted to laugh. How ironic.

My eyes wandered around, seeing all these happy couples and chattering families. The table next to us had the cheesiest pair of people on a date, presumably their first. He kept staring at her with hearts in his eyes and she kept blushing.

I wished I could rewind time. Maybe things would work out better with Charlie if I hadn't had Xavier on my mind from the start.

"I was thinking about transferring to the post office here and moving back," he said and my eyes flew back to him. I smiled at the thought. "I'd like to be around you more than on the weekends. Y'know, if that's okay with you."

I wanted that to excite me. I wanted to jump for joy at the idea of my boyfriend moving closer just to be with me, but I couldn't. In fact, it only made me feel guilty. I didn't want to think like this, but it sort of felt like we were doomed.

"Actually," I breathed out, "I need to talk to you."

And I was so ready to just rip the bandaid and break up with him right then and there. I was going to tell him the truth and not drag him along any longer, because it was the right thing to do.

But then I looked at the door.

Xavier was standing there with Celina, his arms crossed over his chest. He looked awful, like he hadn't slept in weeks. Celina was talking to him and he mumbled a response every now and again, but I could see from where I was sitting that something wasn't right.

Charlie touched my hand. "What?"

I snapped back to reality. "Oh, um . . ." I cleared my throat, glancing back at Xavier who was oblivious to my being here. "Hold that thought, I've got to use the restroom."