Staying High [ DISCONTINUED ]

chapter one

"I want to have a big vintage house but when you walk in, that furniture and design is modern." I say.

"Are you sure? I want to have a very modern house, inside and out." He replies.

"We should talk about this if you are sure that you're going to propose to me sometime soon." I say. I look up at him. He smiles at me.

"Of course, babe. Even if your parents don't want me to have their blessing, I will still marry you." He smiles at me. I giggle and look at the starry sky.

"How many kids do you like?" I ask.

"Whoa there," He says. I can hear the sarcasm. I know. I don't even know why am I asking him about kids. I'm a fucking twenty year-old, why worry about kids? "You serious?" He chuckles.

"But I want to know." I look at him again and pout.

He laughs again.

"You're a fucking tease." I roll my eyes.

"Don't go Ms. Crazy-Girlfriend to me," He says. "I think I want two kids?"

"Only two?" I gasp.

"Yeah," He replies. "Why?"

"Don't you like a big family?"

He laughs.

"Blaire, don't worry about kids right now," He says. "Mind about me, your family, friends, and acquaintances."

"I just want to plan. I want everything to be perfect." I say.

"You're already perfect. Everything you do is perfect, babe." He coos.

"Whatever." I say.

"Fucking tease." He says.

I grab my cigarette box and lighter that my uncle gave me when I turned sixteen.

Yes. I started smoking when I was fifteen years old. When I was fifteen, everything started.

First, I began to be a rebel when I dyed my hair hot pink and sky blue. At school, we aren't allowed to dye our hair so I was the first student to do that. I received a note from the principal and I talk to her. Then, I received a slap from my parents because the principal called them. Like they don't know the rules... My mother and father met in the university so basically, the old coot knows my parents and me.

Second, I made out with Scott Duffrey in the janitor's closet... I know, too cliché. Our adviser caught us and I was sent to the principal's office and I received a sermon from my parents and I was grounded.

Third, I skipped class to go with my friends and smoke. That was the first time that I smoked. First, the smoke burned my lungs and I coughed hardly. But when my friends taught me, now became an expert. Then, it became an addiction. My uncle saw me smoking when I was skating back home. Then he gave me his lighter, then later he died because of lung cancer. His lungs were black and it didn't have a big impact to me to stop to smoke. It's my addiction.

There are more random stuff that happened to me from when I was fifteen to now.

I smoke. I blow perfect circles and Miles grab a cigarette from my pack. He copied me. I smile at him.

"Your hair is growing back." He says.

My hair is originally black and curly. But I decide to dyed it red because it looks like a cool color to my hair.

"I know." I say.

"Are you going to dye it again?" He asked.

"I think," I say. "What color does suites my attitude and life?"