Still Alive

Day 26

Piers had awoken alone with the pillow Chris had borrowed resting on top of him. Attached to it was a note that said: "Sorry to leave before ur up, had to work. I'll come by for lunch. -Chris :] " Piers took the note and set it on his bedside table and brought the pillow to his face. He took a deep inhale and allowed his lungs to embrace Chris' scent. He smelled like sandalwood and sweat and Piers would be lying if he said Chris' scent alone didn't turn him on. He glanced at the clock that read 11:17 am, he had a couple hours before his checkup that day and slowly he got up and carefully walked to the bathroom pillow in hand. He set the pillow down on the sink and took off his hospital gown. He stared at himself in the mirror for a minute before deciding to grab his eyepatch and put it on. He allowed his eye to wash over his scarred body, even with the damage that was done to him he still had a very firm, yet supple body. His slim pale torso was almost completely hairless aside from a peak of thick hair that led below his underwear. He thumbed at the elastic band of his boxers while he bent over the sink, laying his head on the pillow Chris slept on the night before. He took a deep breath in, getting lost in Chris' scent as he freed his growing erection from his boxers.

He pictured Chris behind him, holding him down in his current position. He pictured how Chris' cock would look pressed against his backside before he'd push it in. Chris would no doubt be big, Piers thought while stroking his dick. He pictured the sounds Chris would make while he was inside of him. He loved the thought of how Chris' body would feel rhythmically slapping onto Piers, how Chris' hands would feel all over Piers, how Chris' cum would feel on and in him. Piers could feel himself get pushed to the edge with that last thought and let his non-dominant hand move up more to give extra attention to his sensitive tip. He imagined Chris' large strong hands where his were and this final thought was enough for him to cum. He could feel himself drool on the pillow he was unconsciously biting and released his mouth. A lewd string of saliva still connected him to Chris' lingering scent. He felt the sticky liquid pour out onto his hand and lost his balance in the euphoric feeling.

He slowly slid down the wall as the famed "post-nut clarity" had begun to set in. He felt guilt crawl up inside of him. *I shouldn't be thinking of my captain like this, especially with the state I'm in. If I didn't think I had a chance before I definitely don't now.* As he thought this his still sticky hand traced over the scars on his face. His left hand gripped the sink and he pulled himself up greeted by his reflection. He watched as blush crept across his face as he saw the state he left himself in. He swiftly washed up the best he could and threw his hospital gown back on. He walked back into the room to grab a fresh pair of boxers that Chris had bought for Piers way back when he was first admitted. He put the dirty pair in an old bag he was given to use as a laundry hamper by the hospital, which thankfully had a washer and dryer so he could at least do his own laundry.

In just five short days Piers would be getting released and he'd be able to once again wear regular civilian clothes. He was looking forward to it immensely - especially given how vulnerable he felt each time someone saw him in the thin gown. He thought about what it would be like to eat good food again. He hadn't had a decent steak dinner in months and it was all he had been able to think about every time he sat down to eat hospital food. Speaking of which, Chris would probably be here very soon.

Thirty minutes later Chris showed up with a bag of chinese takeout. "It's nothing fancy but it was cheap and on the way. Besides, I figured any food from outside the hospital would taste like five stars."

"My hero. I was just thinking about how tired I was of hospital food. Though, I have to ask, what's the occasion?" Piers eagerly awaited Chris' reply.

"No occasion. I was just thinking about you at work is all. Besides, you being released soon is occasion enough for me. Speaking of which, I still plan to cook for you when I get to take you home." Chris thought of what he would make for Piers and found himself even getting excited about it.

"That reminds me, they got rid of the clothes I came in, considering the biohazard they became, so I was hoping you might be able to stop by my house and pick up clothes for me that day." Piers felt bad asking but what else could he do. Not like he could leave in the gown, his dignity couldn't allow it.

"No problem. Here, write the address down now." Chris said, handing Piers a pen and napkin.

"Sorry if the place is a mess - it's been almost a year since I've actually been home so it might be a little rough. I do at least remember that there's a spare key under a potted plant that is 100 percent dead by now." He joked handing Chris back the pen and napkin.

Chris and Piers began eating in a comfortable silence. And Piers would take quick secret glances at Chris' arms every so often. The way they subtly flexed when he moved and just the size of them alone was something to behold. It got Piers thinking back to this morning: how he longed for those arms to hold him down and have their way with him. He shook the thoughts away as quickly as they came and felt hot with embarrassment when he looked up and saw Chris staring at him. Piers turned away feeling like Chris could see him as the perv he felt like. Chris was however lost in his own similar thoughts and was too busy drooling over Piers' lips to even notice the younger man shy away. Chris longed for Piers more and more every time he saw him, he knew that it was wrong and unprofessional, *Piers is my subordinate for god's sake, and he's so much younger than me too. I shouldn't be thinking about him the way I do but, he's so... alluring.* Chris washed the thoughts down with his food and quickly finished up. He couldn't stand being so close to the younger man right now. He felt like a beast who needed taming and it left him a little embarrassed feeling how little control he had on himself when Piers was around. He wished Piers well and with that he was off as quickly as he came.

When Piers finished eating he cleaned up and awaited his doctor. Today his arm would be officially considered healed and he would be getting his bandages off for the last time. Normally, the healing would've only taken about two weeks but considering the whole reason he needed his arm amputated was because of a virus that was turning him into a monster, his healing process was a little different. That being said, however, his doctors had all told him he was healing exceptionally well and the arm was the last one to finish recovering. His eye healed way faster than he thought it would but the doctors all said that face wounds bleed a ton and it looked worse than it was thankfully.

A soft knock could be heard before the familiar smiling face of his doctor entered the room. "Are you ready to get these final bandages off Mr. Nivans?" She asked.

"I'm a little nervous to see it healed. I don't know what to expect, none of this felt real for the first two weeks honestly."

"That's completely normal. It will take a lot of getting used to but I heard you're on track to getting your prosthetic and that will definitely help smooth out your transition." The doctor spoke with sweetness and reassurance in her voice. She got to work slowly removing the bandages. She was careful to not irritate the sensitive skin as she proceeded. There were a lot more bandages than Piers expected and stared in anticipation as the final layer was removed. He stared quietly sitting with his thoughts while the doctor gently cleaned the newly released shoulder with a warm solution and a cloth. It felt nice but it also felt odd. Piers felt like she should be touching his arm right now, but there is no arm to be touched. It also looked a lot smoother than he expected, the surgeons did a great job you could hardly see the faint scar where his pale skin was sewn over the slight bump that used to hold his right arm and hand.

"How are you feeling Mr. Nivans?" She asked genuinely.

"Better than I expected, but still I- I don't know." Piers answered, still staring at his arm.

"Well, now that your most major injuries are healed, we'll be starting to take you off of vicodin today. By the time you go home it'll be back to ibuprofen for you." With that, she made her exit and left Piers to his thoughts. Piers could already tell he'd miss the strong pain meds. He was still covered in bruises and managed to hang on to a few scrapes and muscle soreness after all this time. He couldn't wait to get back into the gym, to start training again. He didn't even really care that he'd have one less arm to do it with; that just meant he'd have to work harder and he was okay with that. Having a goal like that would help to keep him sane in his coming days.