I Tried to Kill My Dumb Friend and Now I'm on Probation

Chapter 5: Well, If You Put It Metaphorically..

I slam my tray of food down on the lunch table. I sit down. Irwin slams his tray down on the table, too. He gives me a spiteful glare as he sits down in front of me. Billy slams his tray on the table, too. He pauses, then slams it a few more times, until most of his creamed corn is splattered across the table and his chocolate milk is on the floor.

He smiles, satisfied, then sits down as well.

"So, Irwin," I frown.

"So, Mandy?"

"You just had to try and bring it up right then and there, didn't you?"

"Well, I don't see where I would have had any other opportunity to talk about it, yo," he retorts curtly.

"So you decided to try to talk about it in front of the whole school?!"

"Maybe catching you off guard is the only way to get you to listen to me!"

"Um," Billy butts in. "What're you guys talking about?"

"Well, Billy-"

"Nothing!" I interrupt. I look at Irwin pointedly. "Absolutely nothing."

"Yeah?" Replies Irwin. "Well, it sure was something two years ago."

"Maybe then, yes. Then, it was something. Now, it's nothing—and it always will be nothing for the rest of our lives."

"You can't just turn something into nothing!"

"Well, sure you can," I say. "It's like a storm. All you have to do is leave it alone until it blows over."

"Maybe a two-year storm can't blow over."

"Storms can't go on for two years, Irwin."

"On Jupiter they can!"

"Well, I don't know what planet you think you're on, but here on Earth, storms don't last that long. You can keep bringing them up all you want, but that doesn't mean they're still going on," I finally say.

"It doesn't matter if they're still going on or not. What matters is they happened."

"That doesn't mean you have to keep dwelling on them!"

"What about the people who get affected by them?!" Pleads Irwin. "Don't they matter?"

I take a bite of my spaghetti. "I say the people should just get over it and move on. Maybe it wasn't that big of a storm, anyway."

"All storms are big, yo!" Irwin retorts. "That's why they're called storms and not showers or mist or... or... partly cloudy!"

"It doesn't matter how big the storm is," I answer, "as long as it's over."

"It always matters how big they are! If they're just showers, then nobody gets hurt! Storms can tear you apart! Tear you apart, yo!"

"Oh, quit being such a drama queen," I roll my eyes.

"I'm not being a drama queen, I'm being realistic, yo! Storms always affect you, and if you don't do anything about them, the effects just get bigger!"

"Well, I..." I think a moment. "Look, forget storms! It's like a scab. If you keep picking at it, it keeps coming back, but if you leave it alone, it goes away."

"How could you compare that beautiful moment to a scab, Mandy?!"

"Because that's exactly what it is!" I announce, feeling more than fed up with this conversation. "It's a big, ugly scab! A blemish on both of our lives! And if you'd just stop touching it, it'd go away completely!"