Chapter 5: Pete

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    Vegas was silent as he approached the breakfast table the next day. He had taken his time coming down, and Macau and Chay were both almost done with their food. Venice was sloppily eating a jar of mashed carrots, and there was orange mush everywhere.

    "Took you long enough, Hia," Macau said, giving a hesitant smile. He knew we had worked the night before, and he knew it hadn't been pleasant.

    Vegas nodded his greetings as Chay also welcomed him.

    Chay was such a good boy, and it pained me that he and Macau were subjected to this life, but at least they seemed happy and healthy. I was glad that Macau had at least one good friend that he could relate and who could understand him.

    "Here," I said, hopping out of my chair as the boys left for school, "Vegas, take over for me for a minute."

    Vegas's eyes went wide but I handed him the jar and rubber spoon before he could refuse. Venice made a loud protest upon realizing his food had gotten farther away, so Vegas moved quickly to take my seat and plop another spoonful into his riotous mouth. Happy, Venice hummed and smiled at Vegas, who stared back, unsure of how to respond.

    "Here, Venice," I said, sitting back down with a plate full of eggs and toast, "Dada will feed Venice while Papa feeds Dada, how does that sound?"

    Venice garbled his approval and I held the spoon out for Vegas to take a bite. When he had finished chewing, I leaned forward and smacked a kiss on his cheek, making Venice giggle at the sound.

    We finished our meal like that, but Vegas still seemed tense and unsure of himself, so I needed to step up my game.

    "Vegas, love, can you take Venice out to the garden for a little while and play with him? I need to go over some things with Nop, then I'll join you."

    "Pete-" Vegas started, but I was already leaving the room.

    As I walked away I heard Vegas sigh as Venice called out, "Dadadadadada."

    I wasn't completely lying, I did need to speak to Nop. I found him on the terrace, which was perfect because we both had a private but clear view of Vegas and Venice in the garden from there.

    "Khun Pete," he said, bowing slightly as I approached.

    "Hello," I said, smiling brightly. It was still difficult to fully feel like I was in charge of the house, in a sense. Especially when it came to Nop. We had a complicated history.

    We just turned our attention to Vegas and Venice for a few minutes. Venice babbled as he crawled quickly through the grass, leaving Vegas to chase him as he gently fussed. Every few meters, Venice would turn to sit on his butt as he looked to make sure Vegas was still chasing him. As soon as Vegas leaned down to try and pick him up Venice would take off again, howling with laughter.

    "I never in my lifetime thought I would see a sight like this," Nop whispered, chuckling.

    "You're telling me," I said, my cheeks sore from smiling. I truly adored my family, and I was happy when others could perceive the love there.

    "Khun Vegas is a good father," Nop said, and I knew he meant it.

    "He is," I said. "I just love them and Macau so much," I breathed.

    "They are very lucky to have you in their lives, Khun Pete. You have opened their hearts back up again."

    Before I could open my mouth to reply, a wail like a klaxon rang out, drastically different from the tone before. I leaned over the railing to see what was happening as Vegas hurriedly picked up Venice and screamed my name desperately, running towards the kitchen.

    I turned on my heel and ran to meet them. Something had happened to my baby. Vegas needed my help.

    Vegas had propped Venice up on the counter and was running cool water over his hand.

    "What happened?" I said, trying to keep calm while my son screamed in pain and Vegas looked flustered.

    "I'm sorry, Pete!" Vegas called out, looking on the verge of tears.
"Vegas, tell me what happened," I said, rushing forward to check Venice's injury.

    "A bee, he got stung by a bee. I need to get ice, baking soda, and hydrocortisone. I didn't see a stinger, but we should go to the doctor."

    Vegas was rambling frantically while Venice reached his other hand out for me, screaming, "Papapapapa" at the top of his lungs.

    "I'll hold Venice while you get everything you just said," I said, reaching out to hold my baby and inspect his hand. Vegas rushed away when Venice was securely in my arms, opening cabinets and rushing for the first aid kit in the bathroom.

    I looked closely, but also didn't see a stinger. His little palm was swollen and red, much like his face which was soaked with tears. I held Venice to me and I rocked him, patting his head and making soft noises to try and calm him. My son was in pain and it broke my heart into a million pieces. I could only imagine how Vegas was feeling.

    After giving Venice a dose of acetaminophen for infants, I held him on my lap, giving him a warm bottle of milk while Vegas fought to cover his hand in baking soda paste to help with the burning. Venice kept trying to snatch his hand back, threatening to scream around his bottle each time Vegas tried. Vegas's patience was wearing thin, but to his credit, he held his temper, speaking calmly to our baby.

    "Venice, baby, please, I'm trying to help."

    After several attempts and pleas from both of us, Venice had calmed down enough for Vegas to smear some paste onto his hand.

    "There, baby," Vegas praised, pressing the ice pack to his little hand to help with the pain and swelling. "You're doing so good, baby. So brave."

    Venice lightly cried in response, but he was much calmer than before. He was getting drowsy from the stress and the medicine, and after a few more minutes of us snuggling him, he fell fast asleep.

    "Dr. Top is coming," Vegas said, "I already texted him. I think Venice is okay, but I want to check."

    "Thank you," I said sincerely. Vegas looked at me and held my gaze. "You were very brave, too, Vegas. Thank you for taking care of our son. You must have been so scared."

    Vegas sighed, mumbling, "It's my fault, Pete."

    Not this shit again. Not on my watch.

    I moved slowly, not wanting to wake Venice as I deposited him in Vegas's arms then wrapped my arms around Vegas's hand, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

    "It's not your fault. It was an accident. There was nothing you could have done. Sometimes Venice is going to fall down. He's going to get hurt. When he gets older he will make mistakes. The most important thing was you did not abandon him. You took care of him, and he was less scared because you were there with him. He trusts you, and so do I. You are an amazing dad, everyone knows that. And I'm so proud of you."

    Vegas breathed heavily and leaned into me as he cuddled Venice close.

    "I love you, Pete," Vegas sighed, surrendering.

    "I love you, too. So very much."

    Venice sighed in his sleep and we smiled. There was still a lot of work and time for Vegas to be able to be kinder to himself, but I hoped that one day he would love himself even just half as much as I loved him. He deserved the world, and I wanted him to know that. 

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