Tell me how to tell them the truth
Tell me how to tell them I'm being suffocated by this crippling, crushing, pressure
Tell me how to tell them that in order to not disappoint I hold my breath and so stop breathing
When every single time I try to tell them there's someone to disregard
Every time I try to scream there's a hand covering these lips
Another smile, another laugh, another joke
But isn't there truth behind every joke?
I'm sick of hiding
and I'm sick of lying,
On the floor of the bathroom crying
I'm fine,
I'm fine,
I'm so fine
Tell me how to tell them everything hurts just a little too much
In a place with so many 'safe spaces'
Except for the pick-mes and attention-seeking sluts
But at the end of the day we all take off our fake faces
Explain to me how to be okay, when the boys in my class laugh at starving, dying, babies
Ignorant to their privilege, dying to fit in
Taking away their woes by drowning in bottles of gin
Deep down I really want them to know
But there's a voice inside screaming no
Because I can't remember the last time I was really happy, but don't I dare complain
Because it could be so much worse, someone save me from this life-sucking drain
Everyone feels this way he says
Do they all skip breakfast on schooldays?
Everyones sad sometimes she told them
In a world where the rapist is not the problem,
But the kid who wore the outfit is the one who implied
Does everyone feel this empty inside?
The eight year old me would like to know.
In my most inner, true thoughts and feelings,
- Your loveliest, forever
