The Secrets of Lore Seymour

92. On the Same Page

I've been continuously overwhelmed these last few months. Moving from one issue to the next; I am once again faced with a problem that I don't know how to address. I don't know what to think, how to feel, if what I'm feeling is okay, or if I've somehow become warped from an endless life of trials.

Lore is the serial killer the church searches for. I've assisted in one of those murders. Lore used Draven to make Jakoby forget about me. Lore killed some, if not all of the parents of the children he has adopted. Draven has assisted in much of these endeavors, including what they no doubt are planning with the Red Moon. I never surmised what the church had been doing, and I never surmised what Lore has been doing.

Draven said it himself; Lore has rules, but those rules are warped and I can't stand by them. Harming someone who needs help, someone like me who may be able to become better, is not acceptable. But saving children from terrible homes and bringing down the corrupt system abusing all of us by whatever means necessary; I stand behind that. Some things cannot be tamed by flames. They must be ripped out by the roots. Lore is willing to do that, and so am I.

I don't know if my decision is right. I'm unclear if my feelings are distorting my judgment, but the truth remains; I love Lore. I want to be with the children. I hope to help Lore raise them, to give them lives far better than we ever had. The Seymour Estate has become my home and those within it have become my family, a true family. Not one that beats me. Not one that would condemn me. Not one that would ever do me harm. A lot like the family that I lost and now I understand what it's like to be wanted, to have a place of comfort. I will stay. Under a few conditions.

I hurry to Lore's room, unsure if he has woken up yet. Opening the door, I find him seated on the side of the bed donning a quiet expression. He spots me, sitting rigid and knuckles bonewhite against the bed. Perhaps I worried him by not being here. Maybe he thought I had run off after learning the truth, I'm not sure.

Shutting the door, I approach to take a seat beside him. He offers a cordial smile. "Good morning," he says. "Did you sleep alright?"

"At first, but I woke up earlier and couldn't go back to sleep. I had a lot to think about, even more after I spoke with Draven."

Lore tilts his head, silent questions brimming in his eyes when he merely asks, "About what?"

"A bit of everything."

He averts his gaze like a scolded child, one who knows they're about to get into even more trouble.

"I know what you had him do to Jakoby."

He clenches his eyes shut, gnawing at his bottom lip.

"You must know that I'm not okay with being manipulated."

"That isn't," he crosses his arms, growing increasingly uncomfortable. I can't believe that's possible. Lore's always in his element, but now he doesn't know what to do. Shifting on the bed, gazing at the wall, so out of place that it's visibly unsettling. "Had the two of you worked towards a real relationship, you may have remained infatuated with the church," he adds, looking at me as if he expects me to agree, to thank him for his brilliant plan.

"Was that the only reason?" I counter, noticing the stiffness to his jaw.

Rising, Lore paces the room, looking more like my panicked self than his usual charming demeanor. Then he stops and stares me down to ask, "So what if I was jealous? I hated that you went on that date, but you never liked me being with anyone either."

"I never brainwashed them into forgetting your entire existence, Lore. You manipulated me and Jakoby."

He glares at his feet, toes curling against the rug. A furious red simmers beneath his cheeks, though I can't say if the blush is from embarrassment or frustration. He probably never suspected to be caught and that worries me, that he may have kept such a big secret from me forever, that he may have more secrets or one day try to hide even more from me and I'm a fool to still be here. To actually want to stay.