Lapse [h.s]

Chapter one

Lapse
/laps/
an occurrence in which you fail to think or act in the usual or proper way for a brief time and make a mistake.

It's the night before my first job interview back in New York and to say I'm nervous would be an understatement. I've been trying to prolong getting a job because living off the money I earnt back at home where I was comfortable was easy. However, I've come to learn that I can't live like this for much longer. I would run out of money and that would change my life for the worse. Wouldn't it?

Leah's heels tap against the wooden flooring of the apartment we share, pulling me out of my thoughts and causing me to glance up towards the kitchen entrance. "Grace, come on!" She opens the fridge door and grabs out the half empty bottle of rosé. "One or two drinks aren't going to get you fucked! Loosen up a little. I know you're nervous but you always have a couple of drinks whenever you feel like this or have something big coming up... what's the difference now? Is there anything else going on?" She's right, there's nothing else going on but I just have a bad feeling about this. Plus I don't want to fuck it up, I really need this job.

The interview is for a personal assistant position at HS Unlimited. It's not much but it's the first job I actually heard back from. Thankfully it pays well for a position like this. I've tried to do some research on the company but I didn't end up finding much which was weird? All I know is it's in a fancy building in the center surrounded by a lot of security guards.

Leah snaps her fingers in front of my face "Hello? Earth to Grace?" She slides a glass of wine across the kitchen island we are both sitting on. 

"Yeah, yeah you're right." I let out a sigh. "Sorry, I just really need this job and the fact I don't know much about the company is making me feel a little uneasy. You know I like to be aware of exactly what i'm walking into, the unknown is terrifying and makes me anxious as fuck." I glance towards her and let out a small laugh.

She puts her glass down and grabs my chair pulling me toward her causing our knees to clash together. She knows she can get through to me if she's right in front of me, it doesn't let my brain can't wander elsewhere. "Babe, I know." She sighs "but you have to be optimistic. You can't dwell on the fact you don't know much information." I open my mouth to reply but she raises her finger to shush me. "You could get this job and it'll be the best fucking job you've ever had. There is no need for you to be stressing out over this."

I pick up my wine and take a big swig, finishing the glass, letting the semi cold liquid coat my throat before replying to her. "Fine, you've made your point. Now please be quiet and let me enjoy a couple of drinks." I wink at her and stand up from my chair, starting to walk towards the fridge.

"Hey...Grace?" She calls after me and catches my attention causing me to spin on the heel of my foot to look at her.  "Let's go to the bar just down the road, I bet it'll make you feel more relaxed, and if it doesn't, we can come straight home. Promise." I roll my eyes and turn back towards the fridge. This woman will use any excuse she can to get out.

"Alright, alright. But I want to be back and in bed by 1am, okay?" I pick out the bottle of wine from the fridge and toss it in the trash after finishing the last of it. "Let me throw an outfit together and I'll be back in five."

Leah claps her hands together excitedly as I start pacing it toward my room.

I pause halfway down the corridor, "Wait Lea, is that why you're all dressed up? Because you knew this conversation would end in you persuading me out?"

She doesn't say anything except letting out a laugh. That's all the confirmation I needed.

— —

It was 11:30 pm before we even made it to the bar, considering it's only a fifteen minute walk from our apartment I have no idea how it took us so long. Well, I mean I was the one who couldn't pick out an outfit so I guess it's partly my fault but whatever.

We take our usual seats that are located at the left side of the bar. We always sit here because it has a great view of the entire room and you can see who walks in and out. It's a great spot for people watching, especially looking out for who's hot or not.

This bar is always so busy, it's smack in the center of all the houses and apartments around here so it's a popular location. It's nothing fancy though. It always has the smell of cigarette smoke and the quiet hum of indie music in the background.

The lighting is always translucent which really helps set the scene, it's a lot more relaxed here than other bars. You'll never find rich or fancy people sitting around. It's always older men looking for an escape from reality or younger girls who don't know better than to go somewhere else.

Leah and I usually go to the city center if we are looking for a fun night out. Though it seems that the drinks are cheaper and the atmosphere is more calm here so when we are just looking for a few casual drinks this is where we come.

I called Alex over. He's one of the bartenders who's always so friendly and welcoming, I think Leah has a little crush on him but she would never admit it.

"Usuals please, Alex!" I flash him a warm smile as he starts to make our drinks.

"What's the occasion this time then? You're both not as dressed up as usual" He asks and hands the first drink to Leah.

"I have a job interview tomorrow" I exclaim while adjusting my chair backwards a little so that i'm not squished into the bar. "First one after moving back here to the big city. It's kind of a big deal, I just wanted a couple of drinks to ease the nerves, y'know?" I shrug and cross my arms over my body.

"Took you a lot of convincing though" Leah playfully pushes at my arm and laughs in Alex's direction.

I stand up from my chair and start heading in the direction of the restrooms. Leah is too engrossed in conversation with Alex to notice I even left. That should hopefully buy me a couple minutes of alone time. I push open the door to an empty bathroom; perfect.

Staring at myself in the mirror and gripping the side of the sink, I let out a big sigh. I really need to get myself together. I have had multiple job interviews and not one has ever made me this anxious. This seems like a really good company to work for. The last thing I need to do is fuck it up. If I get the job and end up hating it, I can always leave, but the pay is great and it's a minimum effort job. It'll be a good filler just while I find my footing again.

I really need to stop letting what happened back home get to me. This is another reason Leah and I moved back to NYC. I'm far away from everything and I need to keep reminding myself of that. Nothing can get to me here, no one even knows I left.

Feeling myself start to get worked up, I turn the tap on and let the cold water run over my wrist in an attempt to bring my temperature down again. Once I'm less flustered, I start to gather my things and head for the door.

As I push the door open, I feel it smack against something, or rather someone, on the other side.

"Watch where you're fucking going. Jesus fucking christ. I dont need my drink down my shirt I'd rather it be in my fucking mouth." I hear a deep English accent call out.

Oh fuck. This doesn't sound good.