Bring Me To 1D (One Direction fan fiction)

Suck Face!

SUCK FACE!

TILDE

"I've always fancied the pants off ye Tilde."

"It's always been you Nialler chops. You look sooo sexy in your 'Teenage Mutant Ninja Heros' boxer shorts. Reckon you'd look sexier without them though. You should come here and kiss me right now."

"Tilde. I 'tink we should go all the way tonight. If you want to 'dat is?"

"Nialler, I...I can't."

"Because you're not ready?"

"No. Because....because...you don't have a WILLY!"

Everyone fell about laughing, a few bits of crisp came flying out of Niall's mouth as I pulled my Nialler doll's pants down.

I was recreating my 1D soap opera for everyone as we all sat in a cosy circle in Harry's room on the big comfy cushions from the lounge. I had set the atmosphere nicely by turning the big lights out and putting on two little lamps either side of the set. Everyone was munching on popcorn and they seemed to be enjoying the show.

"So then," I continued. "After that scene, Zayn has a kite surfing accident and is in hospital for the next couple of scenes but it's really only because we don't have a Zayn doll because they were out of stock. So..."

"Ah, this is pure genius," Louis sighed.

"So then, after we hear about Zayn's kite surfing accident, it's Nialler and Tilde's kissing scene," I said, grabbing my Nialler doll and my 'Tilde' Barbie.

"So basically," Zayn asked. "Your whole 1D soap opera is just Niall and Tilde kissing?"

I thought for a second. "Um, basically yes,"

I placed my Nialler doll on his back and put my 'Tilde' Barbie on top of him, adopting my best Irish accent.

"Mmmm, c'mere and kiss me Tilly."

"Oh...ok then!"

I put the two doll's faces together and wiggled them from side to side making loud slurping and sucking noises.

Harry burst out laughing. "Suction! Niall kisses like a vacuum cleaner!

I parted the two dolls suddenly. "Oh my God! My friend Amy back home, she went out with this boy once and he kissed like a vacuum cleaner and his name was Vinnie so we named him 'Vinnie the vacuum.'

"As you do," Liam chipped in.

"Anyways," I continued. "Amy said he did this weird suction thing with his mouth when he kissed her and she used to demonstrate it on me.

Niall laughed. "Show me!"

Everyone looked around the circle then chorused, "DEMONSTRATION!"

I climbed on top of Niall who was propped up on a big cushion against the wall and put my legs either side of him so he was trapped underneath me. Then I grabbed his face firmly in between my two hands and suctioned my lips onto his. He was in such hysterics, all his strength had gone and every time he raised his arms to try and fight me off, I sucked on his face harder making big 'schlurping' noises on his mouth and cheeks, which made him laugh even more.

"Geddoff! Oh my god! I can't...even..."

Eventually I stopped and rolled onto my back on the floor, pausing for a second before letting out an enormous sigh of pleasure and gazing up at the ceiling in a daze. "Fudge...in...hell....I just kissed Niall Horan!"

Everyone collapsed into laughter. Beth turned to me trying to catch her breath. "Tilly, you're so funny!"

I shrugged. "I can't help it...the boy gets me going!"