The Bright center

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When I wake up in the morning, all my family is in my room, staring at me. It takes me a second to realize what they all want. My clock is now white, with 8 zeros, which means it ran out of time.

-So? My mom asks.

-What's he like? My dad asks.

-What's his name? Briha says.

They all stare at me, waiting, and I feel like screaming.

-Get out.

I said it in a low voice, but when nobody moves I scream:

-GET OUT!

They all back away, panic on their faces. I hate myself for doing this but I hate them more for being all her like vulture around a prey. They all leave and I slam the door behind them. I sit with my back to the door, holding my head in my hands. Few minutes later, I hear a soft knock on the door.

-Rio, it's me, Ruthy says.

-Go away.

-I'm the only one here. Open the door.

-No.

I hear her moving on the other side of the door. I know what she's doing. She use to do that every time I would lock myself in my room. She laying on the floor on the other side of the door. I slide down on the floor too. In the small space under the door, I can see one of her eyes.

-Talk to me, she says. What's wrong, what happened. He wasn't nice or something.

-It's...it's...(I take a deep breath) It's a girl.

-Oh...she says.

We stay silent, looking at each other from under the door.

-You know it happens sometimes, you're not broken.

-I am. It's not normal, it's not how it's suppose to be.

-You don't know that. What's her name?

-Eliza.

-It's pretty, she says with a smile. You know you're gonna have to tell mom and dad right?

-I know...

-Do you want me to tell them for you? she asks.

-Yes.

-All right. Open the door now, I want to hug you.

I do. I unlock the door and she comes in. We are still on the floor, and she hugs me tight. I let her protect me, like she always does.

-It's going to be ok, don't worry.

I try my best to believe her, but somehow I can't.


***


I'm walking down the stairs, my hair still wet from my shower. I can hear them talking, but the second I walk into the room they all stop and stare at me. I don't say anything, I just grab the coffee mug and my pills for the day that I should have taken like an hour ago and I sit at the table, not making eye contact with anyone.

-Rio, we're going in town later, my mom says.

-Why?

-I just want to see with the Bright center why your paring isn't right.

I'm about to ask what make her say it's not right, but I shut my mouth. I know they won't be able to do anything about it, so I'll just let her do wathever she needs to be ok with the fact that I'm broken. And if going there and being told by specialist that it's how it is and we can't change it, so be it. The level of awkward in the room is at is climax and I would really like to be invisible right now.

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