My Heart Aches

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Sitting in the dark with one giant illuminated screen. My head leaned on Albert's shoulders, and Albert's hand grasped mine.

I feel my eyes really heavy. This movie is making me tear up more than I thought it would. As the tears run down my face, I can feel Albert's hands reaching for my face. He slowly wipes my tears away.

"You alright?" Albert asked. Once again, our faces are really close to each other, merely an inch apart. We were staring at each other. A stranger crossed in front of us accidentally tripped over my leg, and my face dove towards Albert, kissing him on the cheeks.

My eyes widened and I quickly withdraw back to my seat.

What just happened?! I kissed Albert on the cheek!? I kissed him on the cheek! I'm dead. I'm so dead. I kissed someone on the cheek!

I'm screaming internally. I looked over to Albert, who then approaches me to kiss me on the cheek.

Suddenly, the air feels thin. It feels difficult to breathe and it's hot. "Do you feel hot all of a sudden? It's really hot," I asked Albert. "No...I'm fine. You alright? It's pretty cold actually," Albert answered.

"Here, this might help," Albert grabbed my hand and just held it, rubbing it every few minutes to keep them warm. I held onto Albert's hands too, for reasons I can't explain, I don't want to let go.

Once the movie was done, Albert and I made our way back home. It seems like almost every time I am out with Albert, it rains.

It rains so heavily as if the heavens are angry with us. Angry that I'm hanging out with Albert, mad that we're even friends, angry that we've kissed each other's cheeks.

"Albert, I have something to tell you..." I turned to Albert but he had already fallen asleep. His head leaned against the bus window. I can't help but smile, looking at Albert's peaceful sleeping face. I look outside, where the rain continues to pour and droplets run down the window.

Is it right for me to like him? What would others think of him? Would their views of him change because of me?

I was still thinking to myself when I received a text from one of my lecturers. It was Ms. Farah, the lecturer for my Language Awareness subject.

Hey, Owen. This is Ms. Farah. I'm texting you to ask if you would be interested in participating in an English Works Showcase for the coming week for the department. I've heard much about you and your work. Displaying one of your works there might prove to be beneficial for your future career.

An opportunity to share my work. How could I ever pass up on an opportunity like that?! I quickly replied to Ms. Farah, agreeing to share one of my works for the showcase. I was beaming with so much while reading the message that I didn't notice Albert had woken up.

"What's gotten you so happy?" Albert asked while letting out a loud yawn. "My department is having a showcase and they've asked me to display one of my works there," I explained to Albert while smiling happily.

"Really?! Is it the HeArts Showcase?" Albert asked. I nodded my head in reply. "I'm performing during the showcase too!" Albert replied, being so happy about it. "Guess both our works will be seen by people then,"

I'm happy for both of us. This is a chance to show the world what we can do and shine. "What song are you singing for the showcase?" I questioned. "I'm not sure yet. I'm thinking of writing an original but I haven't had the ideas or inspiration yet," Albert replied.

"Wanna help me write a song? You can write your poem too!" Albert looked at me and said. His eyes beamed with excitement, like this will be the best collaboration ever in his life.

"Sure! We can meet up after classes and work together,"

That was it. From that day onwards, I started seeing Albert almost every day for two weeks. We would meet up at the café, at the park, and sometimes he would come over to my place. We would even get our meals together. Albert would work for a while then he'd fall asleep on my bed, holding me in his arms together.

I never thought I would like to be in the embrace of someone's arms. It feels warm and nice. I could describe it a thousand times and it would still be the same.

"I got so much done today! I can't wait to go back home and rest!" Albert said out loud while stretching. "Thanks for letting me crash at your place, my little owl boy," Albert said as he pats me on the head.

As Albert left, I could feel an ache in my heart. Is this how I know I really like Albert? That my heart aches as he is leaving. I don't think I've ever liked someone this much. It's been a few hours since Albert left but I'm sitting in my room, staring at the various selfies we've taken over the past weeks.

I was still scrolling through my phone gallery when I received a message from my mom.

Your sister is coming home this weekend. We're heading out for dinner together.

Mom didn't have to say much. She wants me home for dinner with the rest of the family. I replied, telling her I'll be back for dinner. I haven't seen my sister in a long time. She's been living abroad for a few years since I started university.

I don't usually tell my family a lot about what goes on in my life, especially not when it comes to the aspect of relationships and who I like. I didn't think there was a reason to tell them until I actually have a partner.

Maybe this family dinner I will have something to tell them after all.

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