I Just Want To Be Loved

Neglectful Parents

Shu Kurenai read through his Science notes again. He was very tired as he had stayed up half the night studying for the Science test that would be happening later that day.

The English teacher, Mr Tanaka, came into the classroom. "Today, instead of reading The Prince and the Pauper as planned, we will be watching a movie."

The class looked at him in interest. Mr Tanaka showed the movie on a screen.

The movie was about a little girl named Matilda, who was a genius with neglectful parents. Shu had read the book version many times.

Matilda was slightly older in the movie than in the book. Shu was certain that her brother Michael wasn't a bully in the book.

When Matilda ended up getting adopted by her favourite teacher, Miss Honey, many of the students cheered and whooped happily, so Mr Tanaka had to quiet them down.

"I want all of you to write an essay about what family means to you. There will be no wrong answers, and if you like, you can present your essay to the class. It will be due next week."

As Shu went home later that day, he was lost in thoughts. His feet were dragging across the pavement and his movements were much slower than usual. Normally he only needed fifteen minutes to reach home, but today he took almost an hour.

Shu was exhausted when he reached home and collapsed on the couch. No matter what he did, those painful memories of his parents kept coming back.

The time they forgot his birthday. The time they missed his first District Tournament match. Every time they never showed up for Parent Teacher Meetings. Shu had done everything possible to make his parents love him, but they remained cold to him.

Suddenly, another memory came to him. The memory of roughly pushing away Valt when he tried to talk to him. Valt hadn't cared that Shu had lied to him or that he was Red Eye. Valt had only been relieved that Shu was safe and sound. But Shu hadn't acknowledged that. All he had done was to push Valt away both physically and emotionally.

What did he say? "You, get out of my way!"

"I don't understand, Valt," said Shu. "Why did you forgive me? I... I don't deserve it."

Valt was the most kindhearted person Shu knew. Valt had been there for him since day 1. When the other kids made fun of Shu's red eyes, Valt had stood up for him. Valt had comforted Shu every time he was sad. And Valt was the first person to forgive him after the Red Eye incident.

Are you okay, Shu? asked Spryzen.

Shu sighed. "No, I feel so tired. It has been a long day. You know, I wish... I wish that I had a family like Valt's."

As a child, he would spend more time at Valt's home than his own. Chiharu, Valt's mother, had always welcomed him. Why couldn't his parents love him the way Valt did?

Shu would be lying if he said that he didn't secretly envy Valt for having a loving family. He had a wonderful mother and two sweet younger siblings. Even though his father was rarely around, he always made time to spend with his family whenever he was home.

Last year, Shu had planned to surprise his parents with dinner for their anniversary. But after making a three course meal, he waited for a long time.

The clocked ticked the hours away and there was no sign of the Kurenai parents. Shu still kept an eye on the front door, waiting for his parents to show up. Over time, Shu had grown sleepy and dozed off on the couch.

Shu had woken up to see his parents looking angrily at him. His father spent an hour yelling at him for wasting food. Heartbroken and upset, Shu had broken down into tears and begged his father to forgive him, promising to do better.

"Dad, I'm s... sorry. I was trying to give... Give you and Mom a nice surprise."

"Stop crying, boy! You're not a baby. Go and clean up the table right now!"

Shu remembered crying on and off as he cleaned up the table. His parents kept yelling at him to stop and he was so hurt by them that he cried himself to sleep that night.

The memory made Shu feel like crying again. He had tried his best not to think about his parents. Thinking about his parents only brought him sadness and heartbreak.

Shu remembered when he and Valt faced off in the District Tournament finals. Valt's mother had made a surprise appearance and gave Valt some words of encouragement to cheer him up after he lost. Although Shu had kept up a light-hearted front, he had felt really sad that Valt's family had come to see him, something which his parents had never done.

Shu was tired of being the only kid whose parents won't attend Family Day. Tired of not being able to run to his parents for comfort. Tired of putting on a smile when everyone asks him if he was alright.

Shu hated crying in public. He even forced himself to swallow his sadness in front of his friends. He knew it wasn't healthy, but his parents would yell at him every time he cried in front of them.

Just then, Shu's doorbell rang, pulling him out of his thoughts. Surprised, Shu went to his front door. Who would be visiting him?