Best Christmas Ever: a Thor x Avengers Oneshot

Best Christmas Ever

The holiday season is in full swing at the Avenger's compound. Every inch of the building is decorated, both inside and out, with lights, garland, wreaths, and everything else that one could imagine. Festive music plays inside while the scent of pine and fresh baked cookies drift through the air.

In the spirit of the holidays, a few members of the team decided to go shopping for presents, including Thor. While most of them accomplished their goals and found some perfect presents, Thor found something a little more interesting - an Elf on the Shelf. From the second he laid his eyes on the little elf sitting in his box, he decided that nothing could stop him from bringing it home.

As they arrive back to the compound, Thor prances inside while clinging to the box housing his elf.

"Whatcha' got there, Thor?" Peter asks curiously, trying to figure out what is in the box clutched in his arms.

"I've acquired us a scout elf, young Peter!" Thor exclaims as he turns the box around and holds it out for Peter to see. "He will watch over us this holiday season and make sure that we are all worthy of being included on the nice list!"

"Oooh, an elf on the shelf! I always wanted one of those," Peter says, matching Thor's excitement.

Steve tilts his head in confusion before asking, "What is an elf on the shelf?"

"The little elf watches during the day to make sure we are all behaving," Thor explains as he props the flap of the box open and points to the elf behind the plastic. "Once we have all gone to sleep he will travel to the North Pole and inform Father Christmas of our behavior."

"And when we wake up he will be back in a new spot," Peter adds.

"But it just looks like a doll," Steve says.

"He may look like a toy, but he is alive and full of magic! The book he is accompanied by will fully explain the whole concept" Thor says.

While he is skeptical of the idea, Steve doesn't want to discourage their imaginative thinking. So he just nods, pretending to understand.

Clint on the other hand, laughs before saying, "You're not being serious, right? You can't possibly believe that."

"Ah, Barton! I am indeed completely serious!" Thor says. "When Loki and I were children, we had something similar back on Asgard. An elf would visit us each morning during the holiday season and hide sweets somewhere in the palace if we were well behaved the day before. If we were naughty, he would bring us a rock instead."

"Oh! Like how Santa brings the naughty kids coal?" Peter asks.

"No, no, no," Thor says as he shakes his head. "Coal would have been useful; we could have used coal in our stoves. The rocks had no purpose other than to signify our bad behavior."

He pauses for a moment before adding, "Well, I suppose Loki did find a use for them. He would save his rocks and then wake up early to find the sweets before me, then he would steal mine and leave one of the rocks in place of the sweets. Once we went to find what the elf had brought us, I would wrongly think that I had been naughty. Mother caught on eventually though, and after that he would just throw them at me."

Loki looks up from his book and smirks as he says, "It was all in good fun, brother."

"Yes, I'm sure it was for you," Thor says as he side eyes Loki.

Tony walks over and gestures to Thor and Peter as he says, "Aren't the two of you a little old for this?"

"Too old?" Thor gasps. "Nonsense! One is never too old to partake in the magic of Christmas!"