The Bright Colours of Misery [COMPLETED]

𝙲𝙷𝙰𝙿𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝚃𝚆𝙴𝙽𝚃𝚈 𝙴𝙸𝙶𝙷𝚃 -bottled up emotions-

Nothing would change Heidi's mind, nothing and no one. Wilma couldn't, Alexander couldn't, Tilda couldn't. Heidi was convinced she bothered everyone simply by existing. I liked to only blame her bullies for this at the time, but now, upon years of reflection, I realise this belief of Heidi's had always been lurking in the shadows, waiting for a reason to surface. It had happened a few times before the bullying even started, it was just so much worse once Lila, Maria and Franz started their sick little game. I tried to cheer my human up. Once the summer holidays rolled around I convinced her to paint more, play with Gisela and Manfred more and even sometimes go help Wilma with her new job to forget about the three kids who made her life a living hell for at least two seconds. And yes, you heard me, Wilma had gotten a proper job after her exams. I suspected Gertrude had done some of her magic for it to happen, although it wasn't impossible that Wilma had managed by herself, but the fact it was at a pharmacy made me think Gertrude suggested it, and obviously Heidi's sister was no pharmacist, but apparently they needed someone who would do everything they—the actual pharmacists—didn't want to do. At least that's what Heidi was told. She was quite happy for her sister, she somehow deep down hoped that by some miracle this could lead her into the medical field, but she also knew better than hoping for such a thing.

One day in mid July 1937, Heidi forced herself to go see Wilma. Alexander was out playing football with some boys and Tilda had her piano lessons so she had nothing else to do.

"Can I come with you, Heidi?" Gisela asked, she had just turned 9, she wasn't as little as she used to be, but she still admired Heidi like she had since the age of 3.

Heidi nodded. "Yeah."

Gisela smiled brightly and got her shoes on.

"Aren't you going to put your shoes on?" the blond girl eventually asked,as Heidi seemed to be staring pointlessly into space. She was actually lost in her thoughts. She had gotten a major sense of deja vu. Heidi had always been so eager to follow Wilma around, and after this realisation a sense of panic had frozen her into place, because she had to be enough of a sister for Gisela. She had to be just like Wilma was to her, but she couldn't, she would never be as good as Wilma.

She almost started crying, so I had to stop it all there. I had to get her back into her senses.

Gisela asked you a question! I told her firmly, after a second Heidi eyes finally found her sister's.

"What is it?" She asked, seeing Heidi's confusion.

"Nothing." Heidi answered.

I saw clear frustration flash through Gisela's eyes. She knew when people lied to her, because it happened a lot, being one of the youngest, her family's efforts to 'protect' her from certain truths and events never seemed to go away, even as she grew, which obviously annoyed her, and it was very obvious but not enough for everyone to stop. I sometimes felt like I was the only one paying attention to each and every Seide family member but that statement could be put up to debate.

"What is it, Heidi?" Gisela insisted.

Heidi conjured a shrug. "Nothing, nothing, I just thought I would forget something."

My human cleared her throat grabbing her tired looking shoes.

"'Heidi-"

"I said nothing! Nothing is wrong, Gisela!"

The hallway filled with tension. The words had burst out before Heidi even got the time to think. And they had sounded so angry, so angry.

The two sisters walked out, slowly closing the door behind them as they left. It was a sunny but windy day, Heidi's ginger curls flowed behind her wildly, Gisela's blond waves did the same, despite all the annoyance i sensed between them all i could see was two beautiful young ladies, and despite the fact Heidi wouldn't believe anyone could genuinely think that about her, i feel it;s important you know that I did.