A pretty moon

Kanao- Butterflies

Ohh god, I am so nervous!

I received Tanjiro's letter- it was on my bed. A neatly folded white piece of paper, with a small message to meet him during twilight. And it is the night right now!

Why did he send me this letter? What is he going to say? I know that Nezuko had given me a pep talk in the morning today about how magnanimous Tanjiro's soul is, but what if I go there with high hopes, only to see his disapproving eyes?

Despite all my fears, here I am, preparing to meet him as I exit the front gates and walk towards the back of my house. I can already hear Zenitsu and Inosuke screaming about in the backyard, and Nezuko ushering them to shut up.

I breathe in and close my eyes. Relax, it won't be that bad! This is Tanjiro we are talking about! Who knows, he might have forgotten about it...

I casually say to myself, as I enter the dense woods behind my house which would lead me to the bridge. Small, dainty steps I take, to savour this small moment of peace I have before I have to see those condescending eyes. Yet alas, I reach the bridge within a matter of seconds.

The trees around me seem to suffocate me with their long, shady silhouettes- like demons, only larger, vaster, scarier...

Beyond the grove was a small bridge made of weathered down wood. It curved up in an arc over a small brook, before leading into a large and flat meadow filled with pink lilies. The moon shone bright over us- it blossomed in its full capacity today. Ordinarily I would enjoy this scene that presented itself in front of me, but not today.

"Ahh, you came." A small voice said somewhere to my far right.

Tanjiro was sitting by a bush, patiently waiting for mw to show up. He did not seem visibly angry, just melancholic, and a tiny bit jumpy. I looked into his crimson eyes- they looked dull, depressed. Had I made him like this? Was this the effect my words had on him? My eyes slightly teared up, but I willed them to stop almost immediately.

"I could not refuse you." I slowly walked over to the bridge, and he followed me. Soon, we were both staring at the full moon without a word. The silence was almost deafening, the wind was eerily whistling in our ears, lifting my hair up and playing with my kimono. 

"Umm, about that conversation we had this morning-"

"Tanjiro, I never meant to come out as rude. I'm sorry! It just all gushed out from within me, I couldn't bear to hear you talk about yourself like that, not after what you did to all our lives. The next moment, I was yelling, and yelling, and yell-"

Tanjiro suddenly cupped his hands around my face. Ehh? Is he for real? Am I dreaming?

"Kanao, it's fine. Everything you said was completely true. I should not have done that to you. You were right. I have had a huge impact on the lives of everyone I have seen. I should have focused on what I have done, more than what I should have done. I was so caught up with the past, that I did not notice how I was hurting you, seeing me in my weakest state. And I'm very sorry for that."

Suddenly, my cheeks were burning. I imagine they are red now. So he doesn't hate me? He thinks it's all his fault?

 I smiled, relieved. "It's fine, Tanjiro. I really appreciate you coming out with your true intentions and apologizing to me for it. It is not something I have seen any man do."

This time, Tanjiro's cheeks were red, and he suddenly pulled his hands away. We both turned back to the moon and stared. This time, the tension seemed to ease. It was as though we were communicating through the silence- he was content with me, and I was content with him.

Tanjiro broke the silence again. "As I was saying earlier, you said something about stabbing me with a knife if you ever heard me speak bad about myself again."

Oof! Did I really say that?  "Sorry! That was probably on a whim. I didn't really mean it."

Tanjiro laughed. "Well, if it ever happened, I would like you to be the one holding the knife for me."

I looked at him, speechless. "What do you mean"? Could he possibly be...

"I mean to say..."Tanjiro pulled out a small object from his haori pocket- a small circular object with a butterfly-shaped pendant stuck to it. A ring! "... Would you like to spend the rest of your life with me?"

Did he really just say that? Is he making a confession? My heart leaped up my chest, butterflies were wandering in my stomach. I'm dreaming, I'm dreaming, I'm definitely dreaming! This is too good to be true...

"Kanao?" I must have been unresponsive for a very long time. Tanjiro's brows were creasing slightly, and his eyes were filled with worry. Today, I've truly noticed how beautiful this man could be. Under the moonlight, his eyes looked like crimson pools- the most beautiful shade of eyes I have ever seen. His skin shone like that of the sun- he was radiating a large ball of energy, filed with warmth, joy, happiness- just like how he used to be two years ago. Like all of his small body could not withstand the divinity of his pure soul. And I, allowed myself to fall into this energy with full willingness, letting it incinerate me so that I left my mortal self and joined this bliss, this heaven as sun and moon, man and woman.

"You have no idea how long I have been waiting for this moment to arrive..." I replied to the seventeen-year old boy in front of me, fully accepting his proposal.

The rest of the hour was a haze- I could only hazily remember Tanjiro's immense joy after having heard my response, how his eyes lit up with ecstasy, how he lifted me high up in the air and twirled me around and around and around, the sound of my voice as it mixed in with his as we laughed away in madness at the prospect of being together for the rest of our lives. How I hugged him, and he hugged me back, and how we pressed our lips together for what seemed like hours and hours in this paradise. Yet I could vividly remember the words that played out constantly in my head, as I hugged, laughed and screamed. Thank god! Thank you so much god!