When the bough breaks

Two

The next morning, I woke up to nurses rolling me down to get chemotherapy. I hear my dad talking to my doctor and my mom crying in the room next to me.

"Doc, so the baby's going to die?" I hear dad say.

"It's measuring ten weeks, and your daughter is fourteen weeks along. We did some blood tests on her and found out that if the child survived, it would be retarded. In other words, it would have Down syndrome." I hear the doctor say.

"When can we find out the gender?" Mom says.

"Two weeks from now. Your daughter is showing slightly, but not enough for people to know she's pregnant. You said she and her boyfriend are going to college?" he asks.

"Were. They were going to college." Mom's voice speaks up, a hint of finality in her voice. "Is there any way that she could attend school?" I hear my dad ask before the double doors shut.

"Okay, sugar britches. Let's get on in this wheelchair here," the kind, middle aged nurse says. She helps me off of the bed and into the chair, without messing up.

"What's your name?" I say, fixing my hospital gown. "Venus. Venus Ross. I'm from the South." I smile at her and she smiles back.

"What are we doing first?" I say, looking around at the walls of the creme-colored room.

"The ultrasound. Gotta make sure baby's alright." She gives me a reassuring smile and helps me up on the bed.

I watched her walk out of the room and I let out a sigh.

"Hello, Erica. I'm your obstetrician, Doctor Patel. Let's see how the baby's doing, yeah?" Doctor Patel says, after she enters the room with Venus behind her.

"Yeah." I say, but it comes out more worried than confident.

"Hey, everything will be okay." I hear Venus say, and I nod my head. Doctor Patel turns on the machine and squirts the warm clear gel on my abdomen.

We wait for a couple minutes holding our breath. Then, we all hear what is music to our ears. A heartbeat. I let a tear fall out of my eyes and touch the screen, tracing the small fetus with my thumb. Out of the corner of my eyes, I can see Doctor Patel staring at the screen.

"Baby is good. We'll let you and Mr. Williams know the gender in a couple days, if you want to do a blood test. Or, we can wait four weeks until your eighteen-week scan to tell the gender through ultrasound. Which do you prefer?" Doctor Patel asks, as she wipes the gel off my stomach.

"Um, a blood test. But, I was wondering if you could put the gender in an envelope. We would like to do a reveal with close friends and family." I say, and she nods her head.

"Of course. I've had two pregnancies of my own. The first was a miscarriage, and the second was a strong and healthy girl. My daughter, Emily, is in fifth grade now." She says, and looks away so I won't see her cry.

Then, Venus helps me off the bed and into the wheelchair. we head to the cancer ward for chemotherapy.

"Okay. We're here." Venus says, in a nonchalant tone. She and another nurse help me to stand and to sit in the plush chair in the far right corner of the long room.

I see other patients hooked up to the machines. They're bony, bald men and women, but the one that really catches my eye is a small girl beside me.

She looks maybe ten or eleven, with shimmering blue eyes and a bright smile. Her eyebrows are blond and her head is bald.

"Hi." The girl says, waving at me with her free hand. I wave back but then a nurse comes to get her.

"Justine, your chemo is done for the day. Let's take you back to your room. Your granddad is waiting with your mom." The nurse says, and Justine waves me goodbye before being wheeled back to her room.