A Secret Within Myself

Chapter 1

    I don't know how I always end up in these situations. I always seem to be dragged to events like these by acquaintances who just want to give me the experience, so here I am. I am at a college dorm party in the room of someone I have never met, This is not my scene. I am not even in college but I have many acquaintances and a few friends who are. I didn't want to come today but Ally practically begged me to, We had only met the week prior but I wanted her to be safe. I mostly come to these things to be the designated driver. Some college girl I just met begs me to go with her to get me out of my shell and I only go to make sure she doesn't get hurt or too wasted to go home. I guess this is what to expect as a 19 year old living in a college town. I've lived in Bowling Green my entire life and I still blame my parents for raising me in the city with the most famous party college in Ohio.

     The party I'm attending seems to be a fraternity party and, as expected, it's a bit wild. The smell of alcohol flows through the air, it's not the best scent to be honest. I lost sight of Ally about an hour ago and since then I've just been trying to find a place to sit down and read my new book. It seems everywhere I see to sit there's either a group of people encouraging each other to get more drunk than they can handle, or a couple practically having sex in front of everyone. I don't know why I keep agreeing to go to these things, I never enjoy them. Just as I've given up on finding a spot to sit down I hear a scream coming from the second story of the frat house.

     "Oh god, Don't do this please, I don't deserve this." It's a feminine voice and while no one else seems to care I immediately jump into action. I run up the stairs and hear the same voice again but quieter, "I know I didn't do what you want, but please don't do this, please." I find the door from which these pleas are coming. This girl must be in trouble, probably a guy got too drunk and is now trying to hurt her. I need to stop this. I grab the door handle and with a quick twist I walk in, I'm not quite sure how to process what I'm seeing.

     There is a blonde girl who is kind of thick in only her underwear on her knees in front of a taller guy who is extremely fit with dark hair at a medium length who is wearing all leather and has a flogger in hand. In unison as soon as they see me they say, "What the fuck?" I realize that he wasn't hurting her and now this is just awkward. Without saying anything I turn around and walk out, I rush to find Ally. All I want to do is get out of here. I can feel my cheeks burning red and I'm also feeling something else, aroused maybe? No, that's dumb i've never been interested in sex so there's no reason for me to be aroused from the scene I saw. I tried having sex one time and got so bored I stopped in the middle and left. I'm lost too deep in thought and then run right into someone, I fall back and then look up. Thankfully it's Ally, less thankfully, she's completely trashed.

     "Hey I think we should get out of here," I say she just looks at me and smiles. "Are you ready to go?" I ask her. She nods at me slowly, I think she's done more than just drank alcohol, I help her get up and walk out to my car. Her parents will kill her and me if they see her like this, meanwhile my parents aren't even home right now. I drive her back to my place and bring her up to our guest room. I make sure she has plenty of water, and then I go to my own room. I can't stop thinking about what I saw in that bedroom, how embarrassed I am, and the other feelings I got from it. I keep mulling these over in my head until I fall asleep, happy to be in my own bed.