Lilith (old version)

Chapter 15

Lilith

I am a raindrop. My parents emptied their pockets of me and left me to evaporate on a concrete slab.

I hear the noise of the front door being unlocked, and voices travel up to me from the room I'm in. 

I assume that Lorenzo carried me here, and that this is a guest room in his house. It's plain, simple, yet still holds a homely feel to it. There are small touches that make it feel peaceful, safe; warm lamps, pillows, a throw placed on a desk chair.

I notice a note on the bedside table and pick it up, it's hand written and simply stated that Enzo left to get his sister. I haven't met his sister yet, all I know is that she's younger than he is. I wonder if she even knows I'm here at all. 

I want to bask in the warmth of the bed forever, but I feel so disgusting right now that I force myself to get up. I notice a door to the left corner of the room, and when I open it I see a small ensuite. It already has basic necessities; a toothbrush and toothpaste, deodorant, shampoo and conditioner, body wash. 

I debate whether it's socially appropriate to take a shower in his house without asking, but the need to clean myself overrides any social instinct. I see some spare towels on the radiator and chose one that is large enough to comfortably cover my whole body. 

I strip of my clothes and turn the shower on, it starts off freezing cold and even though only my hand is in the water it sends a shiver up by spine. I wait for it to warm up a bit more before finally stepping in. 

It relaxes me, taking showers. I can't remember the last time I've had a warm shower, the one at home is almost always freezing; at best it's room temperature.

I sigh into the fog that has already started forming, resting my head against the cool tile of the shower's wall. I want to stay here forever, but I don't want to use all their hot water so I quickly wash my hair with the shampoo. I put the conditioner in and clean my body whilst I let it sit.

Finally, once all the tears and blood are cleaned off me I squeeze the excess water out of my hair and step out of the shower. I take the towel and pat dry my body before wrapping it tightly around myself. 

When I step back into the bedroom relief floods through me as I notice the spare change of clothes on the bed. I don't know how I didn't notice them before, but I don't care except for the fact that I won't have to put my bloody clothes back on. 

If I had the money to replace them then I would burn them in a heartbeat. 

I pull on the joggers and the t-shirt, frowning at the fact you can easily see my scars. I need a jumper, something to cover my body. As much as I've shared with Enzo, and as much as I know he won't purposefully judge me, I don't trust him not to do or say the wrong things. I know he might not mean to, but if you haven't seen someone with scars like mine it's hard not to reel in disgust. 

I fold the towel over my arms, covering the worst of my scars, and walk out of the safety of the bedroom.