Home huh ....
After I ate and maybe zoned out longer than I expected, I decided to go back to our dorm. While I was walking I look up to the sky and admired the stars and the moon. " The moon looks so bright despite it being in the dark". 'maybe that's why I like the night so much because I relate myself to the moon, despite all these negative thoughts that makes me feel like being swallowed by the darkness, there's this light that gives me hope to push through further' I said particularly to no one but myself.
~~Time Skip~~
I arrived at the dorm and everyone was asleep, which is good because I don't want to hear them nagging at me, especially Chan and Minho for how late I came back to the dorm.
I slowly and quietly went back to my shared room with Jeongin, and I saw him peacefully hugging the bolster. I went to my bed and scrolled back down to the article I found. "All these things in the article is fake and many of our fans are slowly believing all these lies, Why?!!!" I said as tears threatening to fall down my eyes " Do I really look like someone with two face, do I look like someone who is willing to fake everything just for fame?" I thought, and these time tears are streaming down my face.
I decided to stop scrolling because it will do me more harm.
I went to the bathroom to shower, after showering I went ahead and wore my favorite pajamas, lastly I went to bed and sleep.
~~Time Skip~~
I woke up because of the loud commotion outside, I went out and suddenly Jeongin was at my face panicking while saying " hyung we are gonna be late for our scheduled interview why are you still on your pajamas" I was shocked and hurriedly went to the bathroom to prepare.
~~Time skip after the interview ~~
We finished the interview in maybe almost ten o'clock. The managers brought us back to the dorm,and after that we decided to just order food delivery. After eating and refreshing ourselves we all went in our assigned rooms. I was scrolling on my phone monitoring the comment on our past interviews, and after a while I got curious about what our stays reaction on our interview, the suddenly Jeongin said " goodnight hyung I'm going to sleep" i replied " good night to you to sleep well". Jeongin fell asleep pretty fast, so I went back to scrolling to the comments at first it was positive comments but as I scrolled down its getting more negative, there are negative comments towards all members, but why is the majority of the hate comments are directed to me? I thought.
There where so many comments saying I'm so ugly, I'm to loud, attention seeker, so fake and many more but what caught my interest was the death threats. " Do people really hate me that much to the point where they want me to die?" I said while crying, I stopped scrolling as I feel like there's a void inside me and I feel like crawling out of my skin. I went to the balcony and stared at the moon crying and somehow it gave me a little bit of comfort but the urge to crawl out of my skin was still there so I tried pinching and hitting myself and that's when I realized that it felt good and I thought it was a great punishment because because I wasn't able to meet our stays expectations and for being not good enough for our group.
And this is where all it begins......
A/n
If you're reading this sorry for the late updates, i actually just got out from the hospital hehehe. ✌️
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LOST BOY
Fanfiction"You know some people say, when you get tired of life you should take a rest/breather/vacation (whatever you call it). But for some people it doesn't work that way. They long for more. They long for something more than a quick escape." A Han Jisung...
