Just Why Not? [Mew/Gulf]

Chapter 7

Gulf POV

After 10 minutes of just talking about random stuff, we finally got to the personal things.

"So tell me about your family," I asked him

"My family? Well, that's hard, I've had a messed up childhood, I'm the only child and my Dad used to be a police officer, he was cool, but my mom kinda never liked him, one being the reason that he was too older than her. I mean they had a huge age gap, you know how arranged marriage worked back in the day.

My dad stayed true to himself and his generation, while on the other hand, my mom was trying to be open and modern, my dad didn't question her much but, I knew what she was up to" his  voice faltered

" You don't have to tell me if it is too personal," I said

He smiled and said " it's okay, all these days I have only been making up stuff about my family and past to whoever asked, it's the first time I'm being genuine, so let me be"

I nodded and asked him to continue, but I wasn't sure, he clearly is bad news, I can tell already that he is one of those self-centered, playboys, who go around breaking people's hearts, the main reason I decided to show up today was just out of curiosity, like how can someone live a carefree life? He claims to be genuine, but is he really?

"My mom had an affair, she was hiding it, but I found out. I did not know whom to tell and I didn't even know how they would react to it. I was young and confused due to the knowledge I had acquired. I told one of my cousins, he was like my own brother and my mother was like his second mother. He did not believe me, instead, he ridiculed me for making such an accusation.

And that's when I went all spy mode and found some evidence. I showed it to my cousin and he was at a loss for words. We knew that if we tell our father this will break him, it will break the relationship and the family. But one day we did it anyway, I exposed her because I couldn't handle the atrocities, as expected there was a lot of drama, crying, blaming, and justifying, promises were made, and rules were made.

My mom started hating me because I ruined her chance at happiness, my dad acted like he was fine, but in next few months, he started drinking so much that his kidneys couldn't take it anymore, and then he died"

The hurt in his eyes was genuine, the pain was true and I am starting to think that he is not lying to me, one side of me tells me to think logically and not to sympathize with him as it will only lead to falling into a trap, but the other side of me urges me to believe him, urges me to sit beside him, hold his hands or probably even hug him.

"I was 12 when all this happened, soon my mom abandoned me and she eloped with that man, I have never seen her since, I lived with my cousin's family until I finished my school, and then moved out once I stepped into uni, I have been alone since, I somehow found my interest in traveling, photography, and writing, and that's why I chose to be travel journalist, I like to meet different kinds of people and experience a different kind of stuff. The thrill that comes with it is fucking amazing"

"You sound like you are living the best life ever," I said

" Well, life was not always like this, I had my fair share of struggles, and then I decided to let go and let fate control all the other things"

" You're wise".

" Well, wisdom comes to experience"

" I agree"

" What about you?"

" Huh?"

" Your life, how are you the way you are right now? Or even better, why?"

I considered for a moment, I was not sure if I should open up to this man, but I felt like I wanted to, I felt like if I speak to him my stress will fade away, I was debating within my head, but then I decided to tell him the truth anyway. I cannot make up stories on the spot.

" To be honest" I started " I did not have a tough life like yours, I pretty much had a decent life and I can't say I had any bad experiences, my parent made sure that I grew up in a safe and secure environment for my mental health, they were always protective and things just used to happen perfectly fine.

My parents had a love marriage, so yes they still love each other madly, they both worked and took care of things and took care of me, the typical middle-class family, I went to the best school, and best college and immediately and joined the best company, I started working, earning quite a some, it's like a perfect life. Everything just happened perfectly"

" Hmm, so best school, best uni, and the best job with a fat salary, is that your definition of a perfect life?"

" Yeah, I mean marriage is next, if that's done then I'm settled"

" You're getting married?"

" No, I'm still considering"

" Oh, god are you serious, how old are you even?"

" I'm 24, I think it's the best age"

" No, no, no. You can't be getting married already, I mean think about it, you are just 24, this is your age to explore, be free not to think about marriage and responsibilities already"

" But, this is how a perfect life works"

" And then what gulf? You get married, have children, work more, send your kids to school, and uni and then get them married and see them have children? Life has more to it, you can travel, climb mountains and jump off a plane with nothing but just a little bit of faith in the parachute.

You can travel so far and dive so deep. The best of all is the feeling when you are so exhausted that you can hear your heart pumping in your ears, all that only to see the beauty of nature, Now that according to me is the definition of a perfect life"

" Haha, we are from different worlds Mew, I envy you, but I would never want to be you, I hardly have time to read a book, I cannot travel, and above all, it's just a waste of money"

" Gulf, can I ask you something?"

" Sure?"

"How important is money to you?"

" Well, money is important but there are other things that can be important or valuable. Like work experience, skills, etc.

"See that's where we differ, my idea of experience is totally different and yours it's completely different. Nothing matters to me more than living in the moment, but it's different for you isn't it? You are living in the future. Your head is there and only your body is here"

" What's so wrong with that?" I asked, he was right in a way, I knew he just put my thoughts into words, but still, I was not going to admit that to him.

" I mean, everything... Think about it, how nice it would be if you step out of your work life just for a bit and be more open, talk to people, eat nice food,"

"I cannot because this is the life I know and this is how society expects me to be, I am from a middle-class family, my parents gave me the best life and now it's my time to take care of them, you wouldn't know the pressure of responsibility," I said, only now I realize why I have been the way I am.

"Hmm, Fairpoint, but everyone deserves a break, admit it, every time I see you are in a rush, you are always running, you sometimes need to just stop and take a deep breath"

I understood exactly what he said, that is what I tried doing when I decided to step into that bookstore where I met him again. I could slowly feel all my questions and all my doubts being answered one by one, things are getting clearer to me now more than ever, I still think he doesn't have good intentions, but he is handsome, and he is right, I should try to loosen up a little and explore stuff, probably explore him. I am sure he wouldn't mind if I treat him as a fling, he might have had plenty of flings like me. With that idea, I smile,

" I think it wouldn't hurt to give it a try," I said, and only now do I realize how happy I am when I am around him.