all the things that could go wrong

anti-hero

I've buried the last three years deep inside the back of my head. Careful to never let them slip up in conversations or see even an ounce of their reflection in my daily life. Pretend as if they never even existed. Just pick up from the last time things were good and you'll fall back on track just fine. To be very honest, it had worked, until now. Now when I'm sitting at my desk, completing an assignment that should've been done days ago. The deadline is a day away and the probability of getting it done within that? Zero. I can hear 14-year-old me crying and having a panic attack because of that 84% in grade 8, promising herself she'll make it right, that she wouldn't let this slide. But she does. I can hear my teachers calling out my name in the defaulter's list and their "I never expected this from you." In this moment, all I can hear is the disappointed sighs from the people who thought I was meant to do something big in the world. No, I'm just what I was three years ago. I promised I'd do better, I fucking promised me. I'm letting so many people down. But most of all, I'm letting down the little me who thought we would conquer the world.